Mating Season

...and love is in the air. Two of my friends recently announced their startling, budding romantic relationship. I wish them well, but I only hoped they wouldn't be such a horrible statistical conformity (in which relationships begin in the spring/summer).

And while I'm not particularly bitter about losing two friends to each other (since so far they've been careful to keep things the same), it has got me thinking about my own ineligibility for such states of existence, and the grotesque double standard in society that has evolved from the legitimate roots of feminism.

In yet another stunning (yet typical) feat of female philosophy, women who are so unladylike as to rival the average man in his masculinity, have found in their thoughts that it be natural for them to be romanced in a classical courtship fashion. Or am I the only one missing something here? In my mind, people get what they "deserve", in the sense that if I am a slimy businessman, I'd be treated with general distrust. Or if I were a refined lady, I would be courted with the highest civility. But a slimy businessman being courted by high society is a little ridiculous. Similarly, I find it a bit absurd for women who odiously lack feminine traits to expect to be treated as high ladies.

Of course, I am no definitive judge of people's characters, especially when it comes to those of the Second Sex, but I think my powers of perspective count for something, and from what I can see, most women in this generation are hardly what they were a century ago. (Or maybe they're just being more openly honest about themselves?) But in either case, I fail to understand how unladylike behaviour would warrant a ladylike treatment.

Actually, I think this is the next step in the male curriculum. After all, a real gentleman would treat all women as ladies, no matter how unladylike they may act, right? I mean, it was proven in the movie Pretty Woman, so it's gotta be true! Oh wait, what was that about Hollywood and factual felicity?

In any case, I think my attitude towards the whole thing pretty much proves my own ineligibility for this market. I mean, what kind of girl would prefer the kind of guy who's not willing to romance a girl? The exact kind of girl that the kind of guy who's attractive to that kind of girl wouldn't want. Or maybe when the girl with just the right pheromone configuration (or something) comes along, I'll come around and actually become antidisromantic. But hopefully not this year. I dread the day when my bitter cynicism melts away and is replaced by a foppish dreamer.