. . .Yesterday was yet another full day of spontaneity. Which, while was much better than just lazing around, was somewhat unsettling in the sense that I didn't have the mental preparations to be doing so much in one day. Anyways, had lunch with a friend, watched a bunch of friends play basketball (I personally don't know how to play, even though some rich kid from Taiwan tried to teach me once... I'll save that story for another time). Then at around 4:00 I went shopping with 2 friends, an hour of which was spent at the haircut place, where she got rid of her split-ends (yay!). Afterwards, had a quick dinner at home before dashing out again for bbt with my god-sis. Ended up chatting until 11:30pm or so. Got to meet an English major. Yay!
. . .Aside from that, not much happening really. School starts up next week! Ahh!!! I didn't have enough time! *mentally groans* I'll be SO ready to graduate it's not even funny. And then I'll get my PhD, amazingly well-furnished house or condo, maybe get married, and either write or teach for a living. (Well, I guess both are viable options.) Anywhoo... I'd best get back to my novel... I wanna get at least 2 chapters done before school starts up again.
2004/04/28
2004/04/27
Lacklustre
. . .Not sure if this break from school is a rest for my poor little brain, or if it's atrophy for my intellect, but in any case, I've been feeling less and less sure of my ken and artistry. I tried sketching the [small, short, graffitied] clocktower in the middle of a would-be park just outside my condo, but that ended in dismal failure. I'd upload the sketches, but uhh...
. . .And I should be reading more. I've become so "decadent" (in the literal sense) that my English is nothing more than a mere force of confidence than actual merit of fluency. Sure, I know some kooky words. But there's so much more to a language than vocabulary. Sentence patterns, allusions, literary references, poetry - all these can be done without an impressive diction. I don't want to get into yet another linguistic discussion because oh so few people ever have the patience or interest to read it all anyways. In a nutshell, I feel that my English has degraded to a heap of bricks than an impressive architectual achievement.
. . .Everybody already knows that I prefer tersity over verbosity, British over American. Which is an out-right lie, sometimes. Long convoluted sentences are pretty funny, as infamous quotes from the TV character Sir Humphery Appleby [from Yes, Minister!] display. Quote at the end of my post. ;)
. . .On the creative front, I've also had trouble writing and drawing. I can't seem to budge a page in my would-be novel, and anything that manages to be scrawled onto the pages of my sketchbook all end up being mentally dismissed as meaningless drivel. And I'm also to create a card for a certain someone who's flying away in a week. But sby already beat me to it in getting people to sign stuff, so I'm not sure if I should just make an ultra-personal card, or just give up and smile.
. . .Anywhoo... Yesterday was pretty long. it officially ended at around 2:30am, but I didn't get to rest until around 4:30am, since I had to walk home from the person's house to my condo. (About an equivalent distance between McNicol+Leslie and Yonge+Sheppard.) That was... fun. I got to think a lot, and mull over what I was to do for and in my future in terms of school, career, residence, marriage, etc. So with the exception of the minor complication of finding a girlfriend, I'm to graduate in December 2004, work for a year (to make money; pay off OSAP, etc), go into grad school and get a PhD by 2008, marry and settle down in either Toronto-Canada, Vancouver-Canada, Guilford-England, Tokyo-Japan or Frankfurt am Main-Germany. You'll notice the list becomes increasingly impossible. So in most likelyhood, I'll be staying here in Toronto, or I *could* do what my father did and start a family in total isolation from the rest of my family. Though in this case, I've already used the word "family" in two different senses. Hrrmmm...
. . .I briefly got to see a friend today, which was nice. 'Cept that things got cut short and I had to run. But at least I got to rest for a bit -- my lack of sleep from the night before thrust me into a 4-hour nap between the hours of 4:00pm and 8:00pm. Waking up was rather disorienting. And the nap wasn't entirely pleasant either; phonecalls interdispersed my slumber, lending to a constant sense of unrest.
. . .With the weekend over, I'm now planning for myself certain things to do so that my week away from school doesn't end up being a total waste. I'll try to finish reading at least three novels, and write up at least 5 more chapters for my story. If I'm feeling satisfied with my work, I might even post it on dA. But in all reality, I highly doubt it. The most I'll do is probably just give it to a few close friends to read. And maybe, out there among my fantasies, I'll get it published... ^_^
. . .Anyways, below's a quote from the show Yes, Minister. Sir Humphrey Appleby is the scheming civil servant (Permanent Under Secretary of State), and James Hacker is the Minister. I couldn't find the quote where he really abuses the run-on sentence to say a simple thing, but this one's still fun to read! ^_^
Sir Humphrey Appleby: You see, the British foreign office has had the same basic goal for at least the last five hundred years, and that is to create a disunited Europe. In that cause, we've fought with the Germans against the French and Spanish, with the Turkish and French against the Russians, and with the French and Russians against the Germans and Italians. It's the old divide and rule, you see, that's why we want to break up the European Union. We tried to break it up from the outside, but that wouldn't work. Now that we're inside we're free to make a complete pig's breakfast of the whole thing. We can set the Spanish against the Germans, the Germans against the French, the French against the Italians. Foreign office is terribly pleased, it's just like old times.
James Hacker: But if that's true, why is the foreign office pushing for higher membership?
Sir Humphrey Appleby: I'd have thought that was obvious. The more members an organization has, the more arguments it can stir up. The more futile and impotent it becomes.
James Hacker: What appalling cynicism.
Sir Humphrey Appleby: Yes, minister. We call it diplomacy.
. . .And I should be reading more. I've become so "decadent" (in the literal sense) that my English is nothing more than a mere force of confidence than actual merit of fluency. Sure, I know some kooky words. But there's so much more to a language than vocabulary. Sentence patterns, allusions, literary references, poetry - all these can be done without an impressive diction. I don't want to get into yet another linguistic discussion because oh so few people ever have the patience or interest to read it all anyways. In a nutshell, I feel that my English has degraded to a heap of bricks than an impressive architectual achievement.
. . .Everybody already knows that I prefer tersity over verbosity, British over American. Which is an out-right lie, sometimes. Long convoluted sentences are pretty funny, as infamous quotes from the TV character Sir Humphery Appleby [from Yes, Minister!] display. Quote at the end of my post. ;)
. . .On the creative front, I've also had trouble writing and drawing. I can't seem to budge a page in my would-be novel, and anything that manages to be scrawled onto the pages of my sketchbook all end up being mentally dismissed as meaningless drivel. And I'm also to create a card for a certain someone who's flying away in a week. But sby already beat me to it in getting people to sign stuff, so I'm not sure if I should just make an ultra-personal card, or just give up and smile.
. . .Anywhoo... Yesterday was pretty long. it officially ended at around 2:30am, but I didn't get to rest until around 4:30am, since I had to walk home from the person's house to my condo. (About an equivalent distance between McNicol+Leslie and Yonge+Sheppard.) That was... fun. I got to think a lot, and mull over what I was to do for and in my future in terms of school, career, residence, marriage, etc. So with the exception of the minor complication of finding a girlfriend, I'm to graduate in December 2004, work for a year (to make money; pay off OSAP, etc), go into grad school and get a PhD by 2008, marry and settle down in either Toronto-Canada, Vancouver-Canada, Guilford-England, Tokyo-Japan or Frankfurt am Main-Germany. You'll notice the list becomes increasingly impossible. So in most likelyhood, I'll be staying here in Toronto, or I *could* do what my father did and start a family in total isolation from the rest of my family. Though in this case, I've already used the word "family" in two different senses. Hrrmmm...
. . .I briefly got to see a friend today, which was nice. 'Cept that things got cut short and I had to run. But at least I got to rest for a bit -- my lack of sleep from the night before thrust me into a 4-hour nap between the hours of 4:00pm and 8:00pm. Waking up was rather disorienting. And the nap wasn't entirely pleasant either; phonecalls interdispersed my slumber, lending to a constant sense of unrest.
. . .With the weekend over, I'm now planning for myself certain things to do so that my week away from school doesn't end up being a total waste. I'll try to finish reading at least three novels, and write up at least 5 more chapters for my story. If I'm feeling satisfied with my work, I might even post it on dA. But in all reality, I highly doubt it. The most I'll do is probably just give it to a few close friends to read. And maybe, out there among my fantasies, I'll get it published... ^_^
. . .Anyways, below's a quote from the show Yes, Minister. Sir Humphrey Appleby is the scheming civil servant (Permanent Under Secretary of State), and James Hacker is the Minister. I couldn't find the quote where he really abuses the run-on sentence to say a simple thing, but this one's still fun to read! ^_^
Sir Humphrey Appleby: You see, the British foreign office has had the same basic goal for at least the last five hundred years, and that is to create a disunited Europe. In that cause, we've fought with the Germans against the French and Spanish, with the Turkish and French against the Russians, and with the French and Russians against the Germans and Italians. It's the old divide and rule, you see, that's why we want to break up the European Union. We tried to break it up from the outside, but that wouldn't work. Now that we're inside we're free to make a complete pig's breakfast of the whole thing. We can set the Spanish against the Germans, the Germans against the French, the French against the Italians. Foreign office is terribly pleased, it's just like old times.
James Hacker: But if that's true, why is the foreign office pushing for higher membership?
Sir Humphrey Appleby: I'd have thought that was obvious. The more members an organization has, the more arguments it can stir up. The more futile and impotent it becomes.
James Hacker: What appalling cynicism.
Sir Humphrey Appleby: Yes, minister. We call it diplomacy.
2004/04/24
Saturday Salutations
. . .Had lunch with a friend, then hung out at said friend's place for the remainder of the afternoon/early evening. Barely got any work done. heh. But I got access to the savory scanner, which means 6 new updates for dA! Check it out! And if you've a dA account, feel free to leave me comments; I'm always eager to learn how I might improve. =)
. . .Meanwhile, some more quiz fun stuff. Ah, so funny, these meme quizzes. :P
. . .Meanwhile, some more quiz fun stuff. Ah, so funny, these meme quizzes. :P
2004/04/23
Day of Thor (Thursday)
. . .Wow, such a full day. Got up at 8:00am, just to rush in the morning to get picked up to go to Waterloo at 8:10am. That was exciting. A certain blood-sister was supposed to wake me up at 7:20am, but anyways...
. . .Friend had architecture program interview at UW, and her mother didn't really know the way there, so I tagged along. (That and I also had some books I forgot to bring back with me.) Friend's mom and Augustine watched a movie while I tried to clean my room. Meanwhile, Friend spent $3.90 on a payphone to try to reach her mother's cell... Just to discover that there's no reception in my apartment. Ha-ha... In the meanwhile, I managed to access bittorrent and got to watch the raws for Naruto 80 and Chrno Crusade 20. Almost finished... and FF7:AC is almost out!! XD
. . .Afterwards, went to karaoke as a sort of farewell party for Daisaku. Met some new people. That was fun. My inadequacy in Chinese reigned once again... Just sorta encourages me to study harder. ^_^
. . .Friend had architecture program interview at UW, and her mother didn't really know the way there, so I tagged along. (That and I also had some books I forgot to bring back with me.) Friend's mom and Augustine watched a movie while I tried to clean my room. Meanwhile, Friend spent $3.90 on a payphone to try to reach her mother's cell... Just to discover that there's no reception in my apartment. Ha-ha... In the meanwhile, I managed to access bittorrent and got to watch the raws for Naruto 80 and Chrno Crusade 20. Almost finished... and FF7:AC is almost out!! XD
. . .Afterwards, went to karaoke as a sort of farewell party for Daisaku. Met some new people. That was fun. My inadequacy in Chinese reigned once again... Just sorta encourages me to study harder. ^_^
2004/04/21
Crap!
. . .Note to self: never make phone calls when you're tired. I just left a msg on a [male] friend's cell phone saying sth. like "...hoping we can get back together before I go back to Uni..." when I really meant sth. more like "...hoping we could meet up before the summer term starts..."
. . .Greeeaaat. So that's yet another person who's gonna block me. Whee... Gosh, being at home is depressing... I want out of here. NOW! The rain seems to have stopped, so I guess I can go sketch that clocktower... hrmm...
. . .Greeeaaat. So that's yet another person who's gonna block me. Whee... Gosh, being at home is depressing... I want out of here. NOW! The rain seems to have stopped, so I guess I can go sketch that clocktower... hrmm...
The Epithet
. . .Just saw a pretty powerful movie - The Browning Version. I cried 3 times!!! T_T Such a powerful movie. And the ending was so much better than I thought it might have been, given the beginning, and where I thought it might be going. I guess I should have read the backcover of the cassette jacket first before going into the movie. Not really the point of the movie, but just watching it makes me want to learn Latin again. And *maybe* even read The Agamemnon...
. . .Meanwhile, I'm finally back in Toronto, and hating it. Everybody's not done exams yet, which is quite frustrating. And it's horribly cramped here in my condo, so I don't have a lot of freedom either. Sister's studying for her exams, so I don't have access to her computer (hence, no dA fun stuff, no MSN, etc), whereas my alternative is to use the out-dated P-133, which while powerful for its day, is severely outdated and virtually an antique in the electronic realm of computers.
. . .I don't really see myself surviving here for more than 2 consecutive days, so unless people are offering me a place to stay for the night, I'm just gonna go back to Waterloo after this weekend.
. . .Gosh, I hate this world. Not only are we forced to live in it, we're also forced to live by it. Either that or live in the simplistic ways of the Amish. Grr... Anywhoo...
. . .Blogging on this computer isn't blogging at all. Maybe I'll see some of you while I'm still in Toronto.
. . .Meanwhile, I'm finally back in Toronto, and hating it. Everybody's not done exams yet, which is quite frustrating. And it's horribly cramped here in my condo, so I don't have a lot of freedom either. Sister's studying for her exams, so I don't have access to her computer (hence, no dA fun stuff, no MSN, etc), whereas my alternative is to use the out-dated P-133, which while powerful for its day, is severely outdated and virtually an antique in the electronic realm of computers.
. . .I don't really see myself surviving here for more than 2 consecutive days, so unless people are offering me a place to stay for the night, I'm just gonna go back to Waterloo after this weekend.
. . .Gosh, I hate this world. Not only are we forced to live in it, we're also forced to live by it. Either that or live in the simplistic ways of the Amish. Grr... Anywhoo...
. . .Blogging on this computer isn't blogging at all. Maybe I'll see some of you while I'm still in Toronto.
2004/04/17
Voyage
. . .And I don't mean it in a French sense either. Anyways. Did some heavy-duty phone time again. Well, it wasn't *as* bad this time, but yah. around 11:30pm-2:50am? Just shy of 3.5 hours. Ah well. Then I did some heavy-duty midnight wandering. Everything's closed... and all the 24-hour supermarkets are far, far away. So yah. Didn't get back 'til around 4:15am. It was a fun walk. Sorta. Got to think a lot. A lot about nothing. heh. But it was refreshing. And *some* sort of good exercise, I'm sure. But next time, I'm either gonna do my midnight shopping before 12:00am, or I find out where the closest 24-hour supermarket is.
. . .I worked a bit more on my novel today. For the first time in like, 2 years! Thank God I actually made those idea/bg files; majorly helped refresh my memory on what exactly I was writing, what sort of ideas I had, what direction I was going in, who the characters were, etc. :P If I'm semi-satisfied with my work, I just might even post it on dA! But that's not likely to happen, so ehh.. yah...
. . .I worked a bit more on my novel today. For the first time in like, 2 years! Thank God I actually made those idea/bg files; majorly helped refresh my memory on what exactly I was writing, what sort of ideas I had, what direction I was going in, who the characters were, etc. :P If I'm semi-satisfied with my work, I just might even post it on dA! But that's not likely to happen, so ehh.. yah...
2004/04/16
Tetelestai!!
. . ....Or, "it is finished!!!" Heute Morgens scribt ich meine letzte Prüfung~!! And yes, it was German. Oi... I probably lost 30/40 marks for the essay part... the entire thing was out of 144 marks, so I guess losing 30 marks isn't the worst, right? I'd rather not think about it though.
. . .So now I'm free... ... to work on my essays. But yet I don't really feel like it. I guess I could work on some dA stuff... or work on that novel that I've been meaning to write for the past two years now... I don't even remember half the ideas I had for that thing anymore... I think I titled it "Ascension" but eh... yah...The mind of an 18-year old me... Hrrmm...
. . .I have cash now! yay! I think I'm gonna order pizza. lol. That should last me at least a day. =]
. . .So now I'm free... ... to work on my essays. But yet I don't really feel like it. I guess I could work on some dA stuff... or work on that novel that I've been meaning to write for the past two years now... I don't even remember half the ideas I had for that thing anymore... I think I titled it "Ascension" but eh... yah...The mind of an 18-year old me... Hrrmm...
. . .I have cash now! yay! I think I'm gonna order pizza. lol. That should last me at least a day. =]
2004/04/15
Food...?
. . .Whoa... I've been averaging a meal a day for the past week or so. ...With the freak exception of Toronto, in which I maybe had 2 meals a day? It's a wonder I'm still alive. Probably 'cuz sby just wants to watch me go through the torture of every exam instead of just killing me now!! :(
. . .But at least I got meat this time! About 120g of canned tuna. And that's all the protein that's supposed to last me the week. I don't get to go back this weekend cuz I need to do some heavy-duty essay writing for the monday. But hopefully after that, I'll get to start on my translation or dA fun stuff. Cuz yah, dA is always fun. Even if its servers can't handle its popularity. ^^;
. . .But at least I got meat this time! About 120g of canned tuna. And that's all the protein that's supposed to last me the week. I don't get to go back this weekend cuz I need to do some heavy-duty essay writing for the monday. But hopefully after that, I'll get to start on my translation or dA fun stuff. Cuz yah, dA is always fun. Even if its servers can't handle its popularity. ^^;
2004/04/13
More Personality Fun
What Anime Stereotype Are You?
. . .Hahaha... Pretty true, if I do say so myself. lol. hrrmm... k, maybe not. :P
2004/04/12
2004/04/10
Changes
. . .I really gotta stop this non-studying late-nights thing. Last night, stayed up 'til 7:00am just chatting to a friend online. And tonight, I was on the phone for 5 hours... (finished at around 2:00am). And I'm thinking of going back into Toronto in about 5 hours. Dun feel like sleeping really... I think it's cuz I'll probably die. lol... barely ate anything in the past few days. Rather dangerous, really.
. . .K, gonna sleep... No need to catch the *first* bus outta here... 10:30am sounds soo much better than the 7:30 one... Whee...
. . .K, gonna sleep... No need to catch the *first* bus outta here... 10:30am sounds soo much better than the 7:30 one... Whee...
2004/04/09
Languages
. . .Another rant. Or I think it might be. 'cuz it's late. And I'm still up. (sorta). Anyways... psyching myself into studying for german/calc. sorta gave up on the stats. *shrugs* Sorta makes one wonder why I wanna learn other languages. I mean, it's not like I have trouble communicating in English. (well, I certainly hope not!)
. . .German. Such an inflected language. Sometimes get the accusative and the genitive cases mixed up, but that's ok. I mean, things don't always translate well, even between two languages like English and German. But I've been wondering -- why do I "need" to learn other languages? Even if I could master German to the level my English is, can I still do the same for Mandarin? Japanese? French?
. . .Is this some subconcious attempt at hiding my thoughts, feelings, etc? To be able to "think" in different languages so that people can't understand me? Nobody likes to be easily read. But nobody likes to be entirely invisible either... At least, I don't. Learning other languages is cool though. Wrapping one's mind around different grammatical (and consequent conceptual) implications that language has on thought is really fun for me. And learning German is making it so much easier for me to understand/read middle English texts. Even the king james version of the bible sounds more natural. lol. I can see why they used "thine" instead of "thy" or why "thou couldst" is ok but "I couldst" isn't. Ah, from a time when verbal conjugation in English was a little more labourous than just adding an "s" for the third-person singular.
. . .But alas, speaking of such things won't exactly help me pass my German final. I'm really gonna have to learn all that grammar that I missed in 201... having not taken the class and stuff. :S Not even sure how I'm even managing to stay in this 202 german class. :S I should pick up some children's book or sth. There's bound to be such resources in this area -- having such a strong German population. Hrrmm... And studying for calc is really about minimizing the number of marks I lose on the exam cuz really, there's not chance in H. that I'm gonna be able to pass it with flying colours.
. . .lalala... I think I'm too tired to be able to think clearly... my brain is really like, turning into mulsh. guhh... Only one more week, and I can relax. ^___^
. . .German. Such an inflected language. Sometimes get the accusative and the genitive cases mixed up, but that's ok. I mean, things don't always translate well, even between two languages like English and German. But I've been wondering -- why do I "need" to learn other languages? Even if I could master German to the level my English is, can I still do the same for Mandarin? Japanese? French?
. . .Is this some subconcious attempt at hiding my thoughts, feelings, etc? To be able to "think" in different languages so that people can't understand me? Nobody likes to be easily read. But nobody likes to be entirely invisible either... At least, I don't. Learning other languages is cool though. Wrapping one's mind around different grammatical (and consequent conceptual) implications that language has on thought is really fun for me. And learning German is making it so much easier for me to understand/read middle English texts. Even the king james version of the bible sounds more natural. lol. I can see why they used "thine" instead of "thy" or why "thou couldst" is ok but "I couldst" isn't. Ah, from a time when verbal conjugation in English was a little more labourous than just adding an "s" for the third-person singular.
. . .But alas, speaking of such things won't exactly help me pass my German final. I'm really gonna have to learn all that grammar that I missed in 201... having not taken the class and stuff. :S Not even sure how I'm even managing to stay in this 202 german class. :S I should pick up some children's book or sth. There's bound to be such resources in this area -- having such a strong German population. Hrrmm... And studying for calc is really about minimizing the number of marks I lose on the exam cuz really, there's not chance in H. that I'm gonna be able to pass it with flying colours.
. . .lalala... I think I'm too tired to be able to think clearly... my brain is really like, turning into mulsh. guhh... Only one more week, and I can relax. ^___^
2004/04/08
Decided
. . .It's final; I'm not coming back this weekend. I know it's easter, etc, but I have exams... the stress is slowly rising... As well as my fat levels... :'( I dun like being blubbery... T_T Aanyways... German, Multivar. Calc, or Stats? Hrrm....
Personality test?
| INFJ - "Author". Strong drive and enjoyment to help others. Complex personality. 1.5% of total population. |
personality tests by similarminds.com
| Enneagram Test Results
Your Unconscious-Overall type is 2w1 |
personality tests by similarminds.com
. . .W00t! LoL... 1.5% of total population. I wonder which personality type is the most rare? hrrmm.... Is this accurate? Dunno... took it twice, both 1.5%, but ehh... the actually results varied a bit... with the concious-surface type and unconcious-overall type bit.
Veiled Thoughts
. . .I shouldn't be blogging right now; big exams to study for. But I've been thinking recently on... "stuff". haha... I was up 'til 5:00am on the phone last night cuz uhh.. yah, my friend and I are just that dumb. (To be fair, the phone convo didn't start 'til like, 3:00am, but still...) Yah.... woke up at around 11:30am today, thankfully. Was able to play/waste the rest of the morning away so that I can afford the time to work in the afternoon. :P
. . .Anyways... back to "stuff". So much to think about, and so much more that I've stopped thinking about. Where do I stand? Where am I going? What am I doing? How am I doing? What am I? What am I to you? Who are you to me? etc, etc... Certain conversation snippits forced me into thinking about certain things, while certain other things help keep me from thinking too deeply. Nirvana, eh?
. . .Social Intercourse, really. How is it that I get along with some people, but not with others? Why is it that my friend gets along with different people than me? Because we're different? Or because *I'm* different? Been discovering some things about a certain friend, most of which isn't entirely positive nor encouraging. And while all it takes is the simple *will* -- the desire -- to maintain a friendship, I think I'd rather submit to the gales of change and accept that our walk together has ended.
. . .Auf einem anderen Thema, I've been thinking about girls. (Quelle surprise, non?) But more about whether or not I'm to marry in life. I imagine during exam week isn't the best time to be contemplating such things, but what errant thoughts that've managed to stray from containment, what is one to do but to catch them? Even just thinking about the age-range of the people I've been hanging out with more recently. Everybody's so much younger. Though of course, the gap only closes via senescence. But certainly at this current point in time... Though I may be thinking about such things, I don't really think my peers would be, being so much younger.
. . .As for whom I like... *shrugs* who knows? I might just end up falling for someone. Or perhaps never. I've been told and assured that a relationship isn't quite the same as a friendship, but somehow, I think that a friendship is in most cases prefered. Of course, if I find that 'perfect' someone... But I leave that to the currents of fate. ^_^
. . .Anyways... My sketchbook beckons... Hopefully there'll be something to earn 5 seconds of your time on my dA site this weekend. :P
. . .Anyways... back to "stuff". So much to think about, and so much more that I've stopped thinking about. Where do I stand? Where am I going? What am I doing? How am I doing? What am I? What am I to you? Who are you to me? etc, etc... Certain conversation snippits forced me into thinking about certain things, while certain other things help keep me from thinking too deeply. Nirvana, eh?
. . .Social Intercourse, really. How is it that I get along with some people, but not with others? Why is it that my friend gets along with different people than me? Because we're different? Or because *I'm* different? Been discovering some things about a certain friend, most of which isn't entirely positive nor encouraging. And while all it takes is the simple *will* -- the desire -- to maintain a friendship, I think I'd rather submit to the gales of change and accept that our walk together has ended.
. . .Auf einem anderen Thema, I've been thinking about girls. (Quelle surprise, non?) But more about whether or not I'm to marry in life. I imagine during exam week isn't the best time to be contemplating such things, but what errant thoughts that've managed to stray from containment, what is one to do but to catch them? Even just thinking about the age-range of the people I've been hanging out with more recently. Everybody's so much younger. Though of course, the gap only closes via senescence. But certainly at this current point in time... Though I may be thinking about such things, I don't really think my peers would be, being so much younger.
. . .As for whom I like... *shrugs* who knows? I might just end up falling for someone. Or perhaps never. I've been told and assured that a relationship isn't quite the same as a friendship, but somehow, I think that a friendship is in most cases prefered. Of course, if I find that 'perfect' someone... But I leave that to the currents of fate. ^_^
. . .Anyways... My sketchbook beckons... Hopefully there'll be something to earn 5 seconds of your time on my dA site this weekend. :P
2004/04/06
Disinterest
. . .Feeling horribly unmotivated at the moment. Not sure if it's due to my lack of sleep, excess sleep, lack of protein, or just collective school stress (for not having taken a term off in 2 years). Yes, that's right, 2 years. That means I've been in school all year 'round, winter, summer, spring, autumn (not necessarily in that order :P). The last summer break I had was July/August 2002... My, that was a long time ago... And I'll probably be doing some MORE school for at least 2 more terms.
. . .GAH~!! I *might* be doing co-op at my favourite school, or I might take up a tempting offer for residence in Uni for the fall... It ultimately comes down to money, sadly. I think. I mean, should I actually *have* the oppertunity to do co-op in the fall, I'll have the *experience* to put on my résumé, but then comes the complications of Toronto residence; I can't work in my condo; too much distraction. On the other hand, if I were to stay in Waterloo, I'd be able to take those Pmath courses and graduate early with a minor in pure math. I wonder if I can do the co-op term in the winter.... hrrmm... k, note to self: phone school contact.
. . .GAH~!! I *might* be doing co-op at my favourite school, or I might take up a tempting offer for residence in Uni for the fall... It ultimately comes down to money, sadly. I think. I mean, should I actually *have* the oppertunity to do co-op in the fall, I'll have the *experience* to put on my résumé, but then comes the complications of Toronto residence; I can't work in my condo; too much distraction. On the other hand, if I were to stay in Waterloo, I'd be able to take those Pmath courses and graduate early with a minor in pure math. I wonder if I can do the co-op term in the winter.... hrrmm... k, note to self: phone school contact.
2004/04/05
Gifts~
. . .Small, short but sweet list. =)
Longines wrist-watch
. . ."La Grande Classique de Longines" inscribed on the back. The case for it was heavier than the watch itself..
King James Vest Pocket Edition (with New Testament and Psalms)
. . .Haha! my favourite sort of English at work! thou, thee, thy, thine, etc. mweeheehee...
Hand-made Windchimes
. . .Cost of materials were minimal, but the time and effort (and artistry!) are simply amazing. Thank goodness I took pics of the wrapping before peeling it apart. :P
Icewine
. . .Canadian? From LCBO? Yah. Not terribly familiar with the world of alcohol. ^^; But it's the thought that counts.
Cancelled/Nullified IOU
. . .Originally owed someone $20... Which sorta got 'forgiven' in light of my birthday. lol... friends are a funny bunch o' folks.
Dinner/mug
. . .Friends decided to split my bill for dinner... and didn't tell me how much they ended up spending... damnit... grr... Also got free merchandise from East Side Marios -- a free mug... which my friends later filled with candy. lol.
So, thanks ppl for a wonderful weekend! In order of appearance (or lack thereof):
Sis -- yah. Saturday was cool... Sunday... well, kinda hard to reach you when you give me *your* cellphone, then disappear with some boys from church...
Ian -- ^__^ thx for driving us to the place, eh? I'll make it up to you someday... ^^;
Steve -- You're gonna be my catalyst to get me drinking, huh...
Joerick -- You were über-stressed, and yet you still managed to force yourself out. ~^_^~
Vix -- thx also for driving us! (when's your b-day again? ;P)
Aaron -- thx for the ride afterwards... and for letting us use your super-cool basement. :D
Lena -- Next time try to hide your boredom better, please? :P But thanks anyways for coming out. And thanks for the most awesome present. =)
Jeff -- when was the last time we saw each other, eh?! Must have been in the beginning of autumn... that was like, almost 8 months ago! @_@
Echo -- too bad you couldn't stay... :( But thanks for making that guest appearance! :P
Shells -- Not bitter at all... >_<
Ally -- Not bitter either... And how is it that I'm representative of several fiercely differing subjects of the animal kingdom!? (all the while, not one is the sovereign... grr...)
Everybody else -- If I didn't invite you, sorry! It's either 'cuz I knew you'd be busy/stressed with finals, or unreasonably far (e.g. London, Ottawa, etc). m(_ _)m
. . .But what this experience has really taught me is that I should have/keep/maintain a birthday calendar... Makes planning a tad easier, and also gives me more time to find/make something suitable. So, leave a comment or msg me on msn with your b-day if I don't already have it! (and in all likelyhood, I really don't... I only know about ehh... 9 ppl's b-day's? And that's including family...)
Longines wrist-watch
. . ."La Grande Classique de Longines" inscribed on the back. The case for it was heavier than the watch itself..
King James Vest Pocket Edition (with New Testament and Psalms)
. . .Haha! my favourite sort of English at work! thou, thee, thy, thine, etc. mweeheehee...
Hand-made Windchimes
. . .Cost of materials were minimal, but the time and effort (and artistry!) are simply amazing. Thank goodness I took pics of the wrapping before peeling it apart. :P
Icewine
. . .Canadian? From LCBO? Yah. Not terribly familiar with the world of alcohol. ^^; But it's the thought that counts.
Cancelled/Nullified IOU
. . .Originally owed someone $20... Which sorta got 'forgiven' in light of my birthday. lol... friends are a funny bunch o' folks.
Dinner/mug
. . .Friends decided to split my bill for dinner... and didn't tell me how much they ended up spending... damnit... grr... Also got free merchandise from East Side Marios -- a free mug... which my friends later filled with candy. lol.
So, thanks ppl for a wonderful weekend! In order of appearance (or lack thereof):
Sis -- yah. Saturday was cool... Sunday... well, kinda hard to reach you when you give me *your* cellphone, then disappear with some boys from church...
Ian -- ^__^ thx for driving us to the place, eh? I'll make it up to you someday... ^^;
Steve -- You're gonna be my catalyst to get me drinking, huh...
Joerick -- You were über-stressed, and yet you still managed to force yourself out. ~^_^~
Vix -- thx also for driving us! (when's your b-day again? ;P)
Aaron -- thx for the ride afterwards... and for letting us use your super-cool basement. :D
Lena -- Next time try to hide your boredom better, please? :P But thanks anyways for coming out. And thanks for the most awesome present. =)
Jeff -- when was the last time we saw each other, eh?! Must have been in the beginning of autumn... that was like, almost 8 months ago! @_@
Echo -- too bad you couldn't stay... :( But thanks for making that guest appearance! :P
Shells -- Not bitter at all... >_<
Ally -- Not bitter either... And how is it that I'm representative of several fiercely differing subjects of the animal kingdom!? (all the while, not one is the sovereign... grr...)
Everybody else -- If I didn't invite you, sorry! It's either 'cuz I knew you'd be busy/stressed with finals, or unreasonably far (e.g. London, Ottawa, etc). m(_ _)m
. . .But what this experience has really taught me is that I should have/keep/maintain a birthday calendar... Makes planning a tad easier, and also gives me more time to find/make something suitable. So, leave a comment or msg me on msn with your b-day if I don't already have it! (and in all likelyhood, I really don't... I only know about ehh... 9 ppl's b-day's? And that's including family...)
2004/04/04
Mist
. . .Today actually ended up being pretty good! :) We were all a lil' late for the dinner thing, but we managed to give everybody a ride. I feel soo bad for making my friends drive other people around though... T_T
. . .After dinner (of which, even I split with someone, we both still couldn't finish the pasta) we took a looooooooooong time deciding what to do. Eventually, we ended up going to itchniba's place and watched Kill Bill. Then we took some random photos (thanks Lena for the wonderful gift!) and chatted about EH and stuffstuff. People left at around 1:00am, and eh yah... I ended up watching Lost in Translation after that. It was an interesting movie. Not sure what to make of it, cuz I'm sure the time might have altered my perception or sth.
. . .But a big thank you to all of you who made it to my dinner! Even though you might not have known each other, you still forced yourself to come for me. Aww~~ ~^_^~ Yes, I'm feeling the love. lol.
. . .And now as I type, I'm not sure if my host has fallen asleep upstairs (after playing SC), or if he's busy with sth else... hrrmm... Church starts in about 5 hours. In about 16 minutes as I type this, I'll have been 21 years old for exactly 24 hours. Scary thought, huh... the daylight savings time thing doesn't make it easy to count though.... ah, crappit. That means I really don't have that much time, huh... *thud*
. . .Meanwhile... not sure what to do for "tomorrow" (i.e. Sunday). Not entirely sure on what's happening. But today was good. =] thanks a billion, guys~
. . .After dinner (of which, even I split with someone, we both still couldn't finish the pasta) we took a looooooooooong time deciding what to do. Eventually, we ended up going to itchniba's place and watched Kill Bill. Then we took some random photos (thanks Lena for the wonderful gift!) and chatted about EH and stuffstuff. People left at around 1:00am, and eh yah... I ended up watching Lost in Translation after that. It was an interesting movie. Not sure what to make of it, cuz I'm sure the time might have altered my perception or sth.
. . .But a big thank you to all of you who made it to my dinner! Even though you might not have known each other, you still forced yourself to come for me. Aww~~ ~^_^~ Yes, I'm feeling the love. lol.
. . .And now as I type, I'm not sure if my host has fallen asleep upstairs (after playing SC), or if he's busy with sth else... hrrmm... Church starts in about 5 hours. In about 16 minutes as I type this, I'll have been 21 years old for exactly 24 hours. Scary thought, huh... the daylight savings time thing doesn't make it easy to count though.... ah, crappit. That means I really don't have that much time, huh... *thud*
. . .Meanwhile... not sure what to do for "tomorrow" (i.e. Sunday). Not entirely sure on what's happening. But today was good. =] thanks a billion, guys~
2004/04/03
Temporal Advancement
. . .So I turned 21 as of 5:06 this morning. Though I didn't bother staying up for it or anything. Woke up about 30 minutes ago. I scheduled a dinner, and hopefully bbt afterwards. If only we had a hangout spot. My living room is in no condition to be receiving guests. And I don't really feel like carrying a looooooooong conversation with ppl in a dimly-lit room -- it somehow makes me feel sleepy or disinclined to talk. Not sure why...
. . .Anyways... Interesting fact for the day: Did you know that I was born on Easter Sunday? If only that actually meant something... lol.
. . .Anyways... Interesting fact for the day: Did you know that I was born on Easter Sunday? If only that actually meant something... lol.
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