連絡インフォ

Well, I guess it *is* dangerous to publicly post one's address online, but I figure that only people who care to send me mail would write to this address anyways...

So, here's my Taiwanese mailing information:

Joseph Tam (or 譚耀華)
台北市士林區
天玉街81巷4號3樓
台灣(Taiwan) R.O.C.

最游記

Which Saiyuki boy are you?

Take the Saiyuki Quiz at anime-doll.com

. . .ehehe... Which one are you? Man, I need more of a life here in Taiwan. I've thoroughly impressed my Mandarin teacher, I think... ...I have until this friday to switch classes without consequence. I honestly think that, given my unique situation, it'd be best to go for one-on-one classes. Assumingly, the price shouldn't be any different, and I'd get a curriculum which would be essentially designed for me. Ah, it's sad. My written Chinese is so much more strong than my spoken Chinese. Talk about cheating through a cheat... (After studying Japanese for 5 years, there's a whole list of compound-words that I know in Japanese, but don't know how to read in Chinese...
. . .Aside from that, not too much happening... ...Gonna go design a pretty cover for my notebook for Mandarin Class. ^_^ tschüss~

o_O;

. . .So much has happened, and yet not much at all that I'm forgetting what I mean to record here in my blog. Such an instance include my recent acquisition of an mp3 player~! :D It was a gift from my cousins in HK. Aw, love 'em all. ^_^ I never really cared for that sort of thing before, but now I'm having so much fun with it. *ehehee*
. . .If only I had my home computer here; then I could easily upload songs... ... but instead, I've had to resort to redownloading them all on my uncle-in-law's computer... ... ... hopefully, he won't mind terribly...
. . .The preliminary Mandarin Proficiency assessment was such a load of crap. I mean, I didn't even write an exam at all. Stupid woman. Horrible administration. Curse Taiwanese government for not having a National standard proficiency examination established. I mean, the English and Japanese have had them for some number of years now... ... you'd think that with Taiwan's close ties with the Americans and the Japanese, they'd pick up on something... but nooo, they have to sit idly on their hands while their 'enemies', the mainland Chinese have already established a simplified Chinese proficiency test of their own. *curses* I'll talk to my teacher tomorrow and see if a more proper test could be done to more accurately assess my proficiency.
. . .Aside from that, I'm trying to make my body run on 6 hours of sleep a night. It's a bit of a REM trick, but my eyes aren't fooled... (ironically...) My eyes are drying up so quickly.. either that or taiwanese weather/air-con'ed rooms are too dry for my contact lenses-wearing eyes. I'm like, addicted to my eye drops now... ... and I'll probably have to go and get some more tonight. Either that or sleep a crazy amount of hours. The funny thing is, I naturally wake up at three and six hours, either because I've convinced my circadian rhythm that that's how it ought to be, or it is true about what they say regarding REM cycles.
. . .And, if I'm unable to get uni. crap resolved at the university here, I guess I can always learn from Martin and Leena's mother -- who is also said to be quite good at Chinese. ^_^ I get to learn either way. Talk about a win-win situation... (except for the $600+ spent on that Mandarin course)
. . .Well, that's enough fun for one day; gonna go play around some more with my mp3 player.. eheehee... ^^

連累了我

. . .Booh... Woman dragged me into choir... which is just as well, I guess, since they were a little short on tenors... (without warming up, I apparently have about a 2-octave range... ....grr) Anyways, Taiwan is pretty fun; met up with church people; everybody's suprisingly (and sincerely) cordial with me... ...either that or the Taiwanese are very good at pretending to be nice. In any case, it's nice to know that the only thing that atrophied was my opinion of their opinion of me. Ah, the joy of insecurity.
. . .Meanwhile, I was able to find sheet music (piano), so now I have some fun stuff to play. ^___^ The frustrating thing for me is, that I'm so impatient; if I can't get it perfect after 2 consecutive hours of playing, I figure it's a lost cause and move on... (might this be a manifestation of A.D.D?) Aaaanyways, my next piano projects are going to be Flight of the Bumblebee by Nikolai Rimsky-Korsakov, and Fantasie Impromptu by Frd. Chopin. *nervous laugh* yah, it's gonna take a while... ... ... ... ... ...
. . .Gah. Dinner time. Mmm... noodles. Apparently, Taiwan is known for its desserts/sweets. Guh, I'm getting blubbery already...

Taiwan now

Yay... yah, I'm still alive and kicking. So much to write, but not used to the keyboard... too... soft... nice and quiet though. ^___^
Anyways... ... things are turning to be quite a mess from what I was hoping for... which is to say, there's a severe lack of structure, etc. Which means I'm also pretty much screwed for my term... ... We'll see how I survive in two months...

小人成長

. . .Yay! Arrived in HK and I didn't get off the wrong stop!!! Arrived in tact at my Aunt's place (四姑媽); her and my 大姑媽 both remarked on how much I've changed over the last 2 or 3 years. And I suppose I have; I've definately become a lot less pessemistic. (It's a lot of fun, but... ...well, anyways)
. . .I don't have anything terribly busy planned for the next few days, but I definately ought to get started on work... ...and probably sleep... so, I think I'm gonna stop here.

白色過去

. . .Ah, too much drama for one lifetime. And yet, not enough. I've always prided myself on my superior memory -- the ability to conciously recollect events that happened in my life as early as the tender age of 2. And no, these memories weren't synthesized; my parents were really, really, really, really sorry and mortified that I remembered some of the things that I did. (Sufficed to say, the memories weren't all comical and/or happy.) As such, I've always wondered about those characters from TV series or movies who have hidden pasts and can't seem to recall a person or event too clearly. It always seemed painfully obvious to us, as the audience, but to truely have no memory of a past event or person...
. . .Well, it finally happened to me. Not to the severe degree of, "What!?!? You've known me all my life!? Who're you?!" But rather, it severely altered my view on my past. You see, up until highschool, I didn't really know how to interact with people; I was acutely introverted. Some might even say I was depressed. In any case, I figured that I was just simply never one to express emotion; I figured that I was quite a freaky child who never cried or smiled, and that I only much later in life learned to express emotion. But then, I dug up some old photos of ages past, of me before I was in gr. 3. And I was smiling! And apparently, I was quite the joker -- I had quite a variety of expressions as well. Which sorta hit me like a strong, violent gust of wind.
. . .Of course, this only begged the question: when/why did I lose this open expression of emotion? When and why did I decide to detach myself from my feelings and become an expressionless idiot? Then it hit me. Geoffrey's death apparently had hit me harder than I thought. In fact, so much so that it took me 11 years to realize it.
. . .And if you know my age (which most of you should), this would imply that Geoffrey's death must have happened in my childhood. The thing is, even though I wasn't socially accepted in those years either, it didn't yet stop me from trying. And in grade 3, Geoffrey was both my only and best friend. And even then, he wasn't the best friend in the world; he was only my friend every other day, since he pretty much was under the dictation of his older sister (gr. 5 at the time, I think), who didn't like me, and would tell him when to be nice and when to be not-so-nice to me. Yes, such complications at such a young age... ... but I guess that's what happens when a woman get's involved. Anyways, he sorta... died... apparently, (at least, the way it was explained to us) a vein in his brain popped, and he just sorta faded away in the hospital. The other children accused me of not caring because I didn't cry. And as hard as I tried, the tears simply wouldn't come forth. I was bewildered. Now, I suspect that that was the turning point in my life when I decided to abandon emotion for logic. And I didn't pick it up again 'til much, much later. (Around gr. 8, I think.)
. . .Yah, this is a pretty grim entry, but one I thought I had to get out in the open. And for those who're reading, I'm sure this'll explain a lot. And while this is one big topic of my life, it is but merely the tip of the iceburg. Not to say that all things in my life were sad, just that significant events were plentiful. ^_^ Well, I'd best get started packing; I'm flying for Taiwan in less than 24 hours.

無茶苦茶

. . .Yesterday was pretty fun; got to meet up with a really cool girl from J-school. She's amazing at like, everything! She has a non-conventional but tasteful unique sense of fashion, she's very artistic, and also quite adept at learning languages (it's funny to hear us talk; we're constantly switching between English, Mandarin and Japanese). Clean too! (Very important trait -- can't stand dirty baboons. ...sorry Chen. =P j/kj/k~~) Ah, memories. Went to Fairview - a pretty western mall, because apparently, I'd miss all things western once I've lived in Taiwan for several weeks. After returning home (which was about 6:00pm), I played some piano then did some doodling in my sketchbook, then sorta drifted to sleep on the couch in the living room.......... just to miss dinner and wake up at 5:00am. And nobody's online... it's too late for normal people to be up now, and it's dinner time in Asia so absolutely nobody's online. Well, I guess it just goes to show that the ol' rhyme speaks truth:
Early to rise and early to bed,
Leaves one very healthy but socially dead.
. . .Heheh. Animaniacs. Good cartoon. Even though it's been an hour since I've been up, I'm still not yet fully awake. Wandered onto someone's blogsite; thought the author was a cool person, so I decided to e-mail him. *thinking* in hindsite, I think it was a bit too random for me. But meeting new people is always fun. Or, if I end up being thought as some erratically impulsive individual, I guess that's just one more person in the world who won't talk to me... ^^;
. . .Sadly, blogging is the only way I can keep in touch with some of my friends -- going off to the four corners of the earth for what society has deemed to be the most highest calling in life -- post-secondary education. They're just bitter because Atlantis went down all those years ago. :P Yah, that's a pretty obscure reference; you'd need to read that essay I wrote last year to make sense of that one... ^^;
. . .Yes, still cursing myself for my inability to go from the dreaming stage to the implimenting stage. Which is to say, I'm always conceiving these [what I think to be] great story ideas, but as soon as I lift the pen to the page, my mind blanks. Or my right hand twitches. I guess I should practice more with my right; try to understand why everybody thinks being a lefty is so wrong.
. . .村上春樹の『世界の終りとハードボイルド・ワンダーランド』 is turning out to be a most interesting book. Thanks a million, Taber, for recommending it to me! :D But uhh... "The Idiot" by Dostoevsky is still my current favourite. :D All I need to do is learn Russian, and then I'll be able to appreciate that novel in its original form.
. . .*looks over to clock* Hmm. Still about 4 hours remaining 'til church. I guess I'll go back and try to forge on ahead through the thicket of writer's block. Hmm... I think I abuse the usage of the semi-colon.

色々様々

booh... Woke up at 4:30 this morning to god-knows what... probably the person living above me; heard an alarm go off several times. (either that or it was my sister... ...) I ended up wasting my morning away by playing Vagrant Story. It's such a dark game... (the setting, mood, story, &c...) if there were any less of a storyline in this game, I probably wouldn't be putting myself through this nerve-wracking turmoil. (I suffered Diablo in the same way... ... though that was more peer-pressure than anything.) But yay! Got several hours of gaming today, and it's now only 10:00am -- still an entire day ahead of me. Aha! I'm going to fill it up with.... .... writing or reading. or both, since I have the time. ^__^
Scheduled to meet a good friend tomorrow -- one of the few people who helped keep my sanity during my terrifying triple terms at Uni. *wide grin* Although, having visited Waterloo earlier this week, I must say, the place is looking a lot less dead than the way I remembered it; my friends all have cool floormates... (why was I stuck with all the idiots?) T_T
Come to think of it, being in Taiwan is going to be wonderfully lonely again. Aside from the welcome oppertunity to be immersed in a non-English speaking culture, I don't really forsee ample oppertunity for me to meet people outside of the church connexion. Rather, I cannot conceive of any other forms of connexions there.
Gonna contact the National univeristy and see what I can involve myself with for maintaining my English and Japanese... well, gonna finally get started writing; been meaning to since yesterday...

Solaris

Wow. Just saw Solaris. One interesting movie. Really liked it. Though the bit with the woman was a little too icky for my tastes. Dr. Gordon is a pretty funny woman. And I was soo ready to get started on my short stories too before going to see that movie...
...ahh well. It's just more food for thought on my palette. ^_^

観光学士

All these story ideas bubbling in my head, but I've yet to actually finish a short story... ... maybe I should publish a book with all my short stories in it... Common theme? Hmmm... That idea actually crossed my mind when I was in Japan; I was thinking of having the theme relate to all my experiences abroad. And in a month, I should have a lot to write about for Taiwan.. :P
Well, I'd best get started writing...

悲しい

WHY!?　*sighs* I used to think that looking at one's heart was good enough. But then my mind goes to a certain someone and a certain someone else. With regards to the first someone, I honestly don't understand how this person has managed to socially survive after all these years. Such wanton lack of consideration for others and absolute ingnorance of tact is unforgivable! .. Well, okay, technically, it *is* forgivable, but it's too trying for me. It personally disgusts me that there exists in this world, a female who acts exactly like an insensitive male clod.
And with the someone else, I cannot believe that he hasn't been yet familiarized with the concept of
1. soap
2. table manners
3. personal space
Even though most guys have a terrible sense of smell, this guy is soo nasty (in hygene) that ANY guy could smell him, much less every female. For someone who prides himself on being an exclusively intelligent and observant induhvidual, you'd think that he'd be more observant about what actions/postures are socially unacceptable. Leaning forward on the table, with the elbow propping up a hand wielding a piece of chicken that's dripping with oil all over the precious magazine pages doesn't help make anybody's day better. And neither does a particle fountain. (for this reason have they constructed this amazing rule, by which most people abide. "Don't chew with your mouth open".) Doubly effective; we don't want to see what's in his mouth, and we definately don't want it landing in our face and clothes.

*twitch twitch*

now that THAT's out of my system..
... time to go sleep. ^__^

思い出せない…

彼（ウォータールーに一緒に行った友達）の笑顔は見たことがあるみたいですが、その笑顔は誰の他人が見たことがあるか？思い出せない…　９歳ときの逝った友達の笑顔ですか？どうしてそのまま悲しい感じているか。もしかして本当に我が過去の逝った友達ですか。そのことはありえない。他人は男か女ですか。
女だ！そう決まった。けど、誰のですか？チクショ…。
まだ考えます。

イエ～イ！

ウォータールー大学に着きました！夜の１１時以下に着きましたが僕は朝の何時に眠りましたか…？３時くらいかな…。その夜に、何もしなかった。友達とちょっと喋りましたが今日彼は数学能力試験がある。（すごいかんじだね。）^_^
それで自分で絵を描いたし、小説を読んだし、電子メールを書いたけどその前によく寝なかったから本当に眠いになりました。
さっき言ったの小説が完全にわからないが、ますます、辞典でわかりになります。　最初はおもしろいだったけど２４ページまでだけを読んでいました。
今は８時半位。我が友達もう寝ているぞ。「何から何までの音が寝るときに聞こえないぞ」と彼は僕と言った。信じられないと私は思ったが、そのあと彼は大きい音な音楽をパソコンで弾いていて、そのまま寝た。
本気だにゃ？！と僕は思った。何って人だ…。そのようにできることはスゲーー！（少し怖い感じる。）
僕は目覚めたときは朝の６時ぐらいだった。つまーんない！と思った。そして、絵を描いて、小説を読んだ。それでこの日記を書いている。
僕の友達の中に、何人はこの日記がわかるかな…。たぶんすごく多い文法間違いができたんだね。
あっ空は明るいに成りました！^_^
それじゃ、小説を読んでもどるぞ～。

外語行くぞ!

あはは！最初に日本語で行きましょう！ちょっとつまらないのだ。　最近は悪かったな～
もうアジア時間で住んでいる。村上春樹の『世界の終りとハードボイルド･ワンダーランド』を読んでみて、難しい！その文は超長い！！！
くそ。
…けど、面白い小説だってばよ。　^_^

全心恨她

. . .Well, I've been back for a bit now. Still haven't gotten around to getting my Japan diary online yet... heh. I probably won't 'til after this weekend. Both happy and sad, hopeful and depressed at the moment. Apparently, literary prowless is absolutely no indication of one's tact and consideration of others. Either that or a certain genius midget finds me more contempable than she's letting on. The initial indignation of being insulted in one's own home takes quite the quelling effort.
. . .Got in contact with a friend I haven't seen for almost half a year. Planned to meet next week. ^__^ Speaking of meeting, I think I was supposed to meet R.S. on Saturday but I haven't heard from him. But arg! I want my Paris photos... T_T
. . .Aside from the social scene, getting ready for Taiwan. not terribly sure what I want to do yet though. As long as I focus on learning the language, I'm sure I'll think of something. ...And yes, my sleeping schedule is still a bit warped. I think I may as well not bother adjusting to Toronto time, since I'll be gone in a week or so anyways. I just hope I can get comfortable living there in Taiwan. The language barrier is a large wall I hope to destroy during my stay there. Well, anyway. Better get back to writing my academic proposal.