. . .Raining lightly today. Again. I'm starting to dread my return to Toronto, both because of the linguist disadvantage I'll be bringing myself (with respect to Chinese) and because of the temperatures. It's still above 20°C here in Taipei while it's already well below-zero temps in Toronto... yikes. Well, so much for my perpetual spring...
. . .Meanwhile, I'm thinking about starting a webcomic... or something... Nothing fancy and nothing big. And most importantly, aimed for Chinese-English bilinguals! Mwahaha. At the suggestion of a friend (who noted that my life was already like a comic strip), I'm already commemorating some rather ehh.... 'unique' situations into a four-to-six-celled comic strips. Hehe. Whee... Now I gotta think about size, cell arrangement, colour/no-colour?, &c.
. . .Meanwhile, test on Monday for those three Chinese poems, so I guess I ought to really study this time and see if I can't get 100%. ^__^
2003/11/28
2003/11/26
Perception and Bases
. . .And by bases, I mean a set of axis from which everything else (of one's personality, thinking, etc.) derives. Recent chain of events have got me rethinking something I once was traumatized over.
. . .Apparently, most guys (whom I've met) treat guys and girls differently, as if there's some sort of fundamental difference between them. Now, I'm not saying that we're the same, but to imply that one's personal and emotional development and status is largely dictated by one's hormones is rather erroneous.
. . .I totally don't understand why anybody would treat the two genders differently. As I've mentioned before, it's almost as if it's because a guy sees another guy as either competition or college, while he sees a female as either enemy or interest. Such linear thinking is both unbecoming of the guy and everybody else who interacts with him. You'll notice that I'm condemning the male perspective because, in my experience, females tend to generalize less about these things.
. . .Anyways, why?!?! I totally don't understand it. I mean, when I meet people, I look at it from a personality/interest point of view. Do we share common interests or views? Do we both hate eating mushrooms and enjoy playing DDR? Do we both prefer elegance over colourful? (etc, etc.)
. . .The other thing I don't get is the whole emotion/feeling thing. I mean, how is it wrong for a guy to open up and "bear his soul" to another guy? But something about being a 'real' man. Can't cry ever. Unless it REALLY hurt. And you're alone. Both conditions must be met. (paraphrased quote from Mr. McPherson -- head of English at DMCI.) But what's up with that? I mean, if I can't connect with a guy on an emotional/personal level, how exactly am I friends with this guy? What kind of friendship would this be? And for this reason, I think is probably why I'm able to maintain my friendships with females more than males. And interesting enough, it wasn't until recently that I just realized that this was the case -- I used to always figure that the male-to-female ratio was about even.
. . .But apparently, among guys who aren't too open about sharing feelings/thoughts with other guys, there's some sort of unwritten agreement. They maintain their superficial, superfluous interactions, discussing the most immaterial, trivial matters to serve as a medium for 'bonding'. Making vulgar jokes about sex, beer and sports. (and yes, I'm generalizing right now as well. I have an image of the average college American in my head right now...)
. . .But then again, that's me. I guess guys like to take these things in unnecessarily small steps. I like to jump straight into the heart of the matter and figure things out thoroughly -- whether or not I'm able to substain a friendship with any given individual.
. . .And sadly, this is probably the reason why most guys tend not to be very close with me; they're not too keen on talking about feelings, thoughts, etc. And now that I'm going back to Waterloo, where they're not even aware they have feelings............................. Oi...
. . .Apparently, most guys (whom I've met) treat guys and girls differently, as if there's some sort of fundamental difference between them. Now, I'm not saying that we're the same, but to imply that one's personal and emotional development and status is largely dictated by one's hormones is rather erroneous.
. . .I totally don't understand why anybody would treat the two genders differently. As I've mentioned before, it's almost as if it's because a guy sees another guy as either competition or college, while he sees a female as either enemy or interest. Such linear thinking is both unbecoming of the guy and everybody else who interacts with him. You'll notice that I'm condemning the male perspective because, in my experience, females tend to generalize less about these things.
. . .Anyways, why?!?! I totally don't understand it. I mean, when I meet people, I look at it from a personality/interest point of view. Do we share common interests or views? Do we both hate eating mushrooms and enjoy playing DDR? Do we both prefer elegance over colourful? (etc, etc.)
. . .The other thing I don't get is the whole emotion/feeling thing. I mean, how is it wrong for a guy to open up and "bear his soul" to another guy? But something about being a 'real' man. Can't cry ever. Unless it REALLY hurt. And you're alone. Both conditions must be met. (paraphrased quote from Mr. McPherson -- head of English at DMCI.) But what's up with that? I mean, if I can't connect with a guy on an emotional/personal level, how exactly am I friends with this guy? What kind of friendship would this be? And for this reason, I think is probably why I'm able to maintain my friendships with females more than males. And interesting enough, it wasn't until recently that I just realized that this was the case -- I used to always figure that the male-to-female ratio was about even.
. . .But apparently, among guys who aren't too open about sharing feelings/thoughts with other guys, there's some sort of unwritten agreement. They maintain their superficial, superfluous interactions, discussing the most immaterial, trivial matters to serve as a medium for 'bonding'. Making vulgar jokes about sex, beer and sports. (and yes, I'm generalizing right now as well. I have an image of the average college American in my head right now...)
. . .But then again, that's me. I guess guys like to take these things in unnecessarily small steps. I like to jump straight into the heart of the matter and figure things out thoroughly -- whether or not I'm able to substain a friendship with any given individual.
. . .And sadly, this is probably the reason why most guys tend not to be very close with me; they're not too keen on talking about feelings, thoughts, etc. And now that I'm going back to Waterloo, where they're not even aware they have feelings............................. Oi...
2003/11/24
Chivalry
. . .This is largely in reaction to a blogpost I read regarding chivalry. He shared his two cents and now I'm sharing mine. It is important to note that I'm only continuing from what my friend has blogged, and therefore won't bother myself with a technical definition of my terms, as would be required, were this technical/legal writing. Sufficed to say, it should be fairly obviously what is meant when the term 'chivalry' is used.
. . .Chivalry, in my mind, is a good thing. But I feel it's important to make a distinction between men who act chivalrous for the sake of seeming chivalrous as opposed to the other group of men who are chivalrous as a side effect of caring for others' well-being.
. . .Those first group of men, in my opinion, are usually dolts(for lack of a better term), gauche individuals who're generally in math or computers, etc. They think that by blindly/rigidly following the 'rules of chivalry' they can somehow successfully integrate themselves into a mix-gendered society. Unfortunately for them, they can't skip steps like that. One must first be clean (sanitary). Then one must be considerate. (This actually takes some brain-power.) Then one must be polite to everybody out of respect to each and every individual as an individual. It is only at this point where this accomplished men have the ability and the faculties to properly learn and utilyze 'chivalry'.
. . .Otherwise, it's just hollow actions; words without meaning. What good is it for somebody to do something if he doesn't mean it? I mean, there's supposed to be honour in chivalry. If some base, despicable creature (i.e. a guy) copies the gestures and actions characteristic of chivalry, most members of society can easily see through such cheap imitations. Where's the honour in that?
. . .Of the gentleman, it should be obvious why such qualities of honour and chivalry exude from his very presence. Chivalry, then, isn't so much of a practised skill, but rather his respect and honour made manifest.
. . .And for some *ick* guy to come along and claim to be chivalrous when he lacks the most basic of human interaction ability, one is seriously forced to question just exactly where his honour lies.
. . .Having now articulated what I feel to be true chivalry, there begins another question of its social implications. Many have allured that chivalry is indicative of the social oppression and reminder of the unjust mentality of a male-dominant society. However, I would argue that a truely chivalrous individual isn't prejuduced for women, but rather, have more of a 'the strong should protect the weak' sort of thing.
. . .However, I personally think that this level of respect shouldn't be restricted to females for two reasons:
1. females aren't as weak as they used to.
2. with all those permutable sexual identities, it's just safer to be nice to everybody. =)
. . .Chivalry, in my mind, is a good thing. But I feel it's important to make a distinction between men who act chivalrous for the sake of seeming chivalrous as opposed to the other group of men who are chivalrous as a side effect of caring for others' well-being.
. . .Those first group of men, in my opinion, are usually dolts(for lack of a better term), gauche individuals who're generally in math or computers, etc. They think that by blindly/rigidly following the 'rules of chivalry' they can somehow successfully integrate themselves into a mix-gendered society. Unfortunately for them, they can't skip steps like that. One must first be clean (sanitary). Then one must be considerate. (This actually takes some brain-power.) Then one must be polite to everybody out of respect to each and every individual as an individual. It is only at this point where this accomplished men have the ability and the faculties to properly learn and utilyze 'chivalry'.
. . .Otherwise, it's just hollow actions; words without meaning. What good is it for somebody to do something if he doesn't mean it? I mean, there's supposed to be honour in chivalry. If some base, despicable creature (i.e. a guy) copies the gestures and actions characteristic of chivalry, most members of society can easily see through such cheap imitations. Where's the honour in that?
. . .Of the gentleman, it should be obvious why such qualities of honour and chivalry exude from his very presence. Chivalry, then, isn't so much of a practised skill, but rather his respect and honour made manifest.
. . .And for some *ick* guy to come along and claim to be chivalrous when he lacks the most basic of human interaction ability, one is seriously forced to question just exactly where his honour lies.
. . .Having now articulated what I feel to be true chivalry, there begins another question of its social implications. Many have allured that chivalry is indicative of the social oppression and reminder of the unjust mentality of a male-dominant society. However, I would argue that a truely chivalrous individual isn't prejuduced for women, but rather, have more of a 'the strong should protect the weak' sort of thing.
. . .However, I personally think that this level of respect shouldn't be restricted to females for two reasons:
1. females aren't as weak as they used to.
2. with all those permutable sexual identities, it's just safer to be nice to everybody. =)
Effective Openings
. . ." 'This is gonna be great!' he said to himself as he unbuttoned her blouse." Haha. Isn't that a hilarious opening. Already, you're like "huh, what's going on?!" Second sentence: "before he went further, he straightened his drycleaners uniform, then tossed the blouse into the 'to clean' pile."
. . .Hehe... No, I didn't that up. Somebody else did, though this was told to me in conversation, so I can't remember the exact words used. The basic concept was the same though. And I think it wonderfully illustrates my point. It doesn't matter how brillliant the content is, if it's not presentable. Not to say that all scientific papers need to be commercialized, but that if science isn't so boring, they should be able to prove it! Entice the reader, right?
. . .Just a thought... ^^;
. . .Hehe... No, I didn't that up. Somebody else did, though this was told to me in conversation, so I can't remember the exact words used. The basic concept was the same though. And I think it wonderfully illustrates my point. It doesn't matter how brillliant the content is, if it's not presentable. Not to say that all scientific papers need to be commercialized, but that if science isn't so boring, they should be able to prove it! Entice the reader, right?
. . .Just a thought... ^^;
Mirthful Musings
. . .Ahaha. Reminded of something that happened a while back. Waaay back. Like, maybe 4 years ago or so. Back to a time when I would still go outside and play. (lol) So there I was in Canada Paramount's Wonderland with the youth fellowship of my church, on one of the rollar coasters. I remember sitting beside Alison, but I can't remember if I was on the right or left. Anyways, the ride was making all these strange sharp turns and dives, and during one of these sharp turns, Alison's head knocks into my own head.
. . ."ow," I say in bored silence.
. . ."sorry," she returns in equally hushed tones. Meanwhile, everybody else was excited or panicked and screaming at the top of their little vocal cords. (The poor children didn't know to use their diaphragms.) Ahaha... we were so brilliantly British then, Alison and I. Wonderfully detached from the world around us. "Oh dear, are you dying? That's a rather minor inconvenience for you, isn't it." Haha..
. . .Ah, good memories. It's funny how when you encounter rough times with a friend, you can't wait to denounce your friendship, but after a few years of a good, solid relationship, you cannot imagine how you life could have been without that friend.
. . .Well, at least that's how I feel with all my close friends. I guess that's part of what they mean by "you make a difference". So even if they're not directly influencing your preferences or modes of thinking, even if they're not spending every waking moment or bleeding every secret, just their mere presense is part of the reason why and how you manage to maintain your sanity in an otherwise cold, harsh world. And as cynical as I was in HS, it wasn't until I was truely alone that I realized this simple truth.
. . .So to all my dear friends (who should know who they are), thank you for being there. Thank you for giving me rides so I wouldn't have to walk in snow, or giving me sound advice when I needed it. Thank you for giving me il-advice even, allowing me the oppertunity to learn why one shouldn't do something. Thank you for just being there, laughing with me, or crying with me. *warm hugs*
. . .Ehh... no, not you Shelly.
. . ."ow," I say in bored silence.
. . ."sorry," she returns in equally hushed tones. Meanwhile, everybody else was excited or panicked and screaming at the top of their little vocal cords. (The poor children didn't know to use their diaphragms.) Ahaha... we were so brilliantly British then, Alison and I. Wonderfully detached from the world around us. "Oh dear, are you dying? That's a rather minor inconvenience for you, isn't it." Haha..
. . .Ah, good memories. It's funny how when you encounter rough times with a friend, you can't wait to denounce your friendship, but after a few years of a good, solid relationship, you cannot imagine how you life could have been without that friend.
. . .Well, at least that's how I feel with all my close friends. I guess that's part of what they mean by "you make a difference". So even if they're not directly influencing your preferences or modes of thinking, even if they're not spending every waking moment or bleeding every secret, just their mere presense is part of the reason why and how you manage to maintain your sanity in an otherwise cold, harsh world. And as cynical as I was in HS, it wasn't until I was truely alone that I realized this simple truth.
. . .So to all my dear friends (who should know who they are), thank you for being there. Thank you for giving me rides so I wouldn't have to walk in snow, or giving me sound advice when I needed it. Thank you for giving me il-advice even, allowing me the oppertunity to learn why one shouldn't do something. Thank you for just being there, laughing with me, or crying with me. *warm hugs*
. . .Ehh... no, not you Shelly.
2003/11/21
Hymn to Intellectual Beauty
by Percy Bysshe Shelley (1792-1822)
The awful shadow of some unseen Power
Floats though unseen among us; visiting
This various world with as inconstant wing
As summer winds that creep from flower to flower;
Like moonbeams that behind some piny mountain shower,
It visits with inconstant glance
Each human heart and countenance;
Like hues and harmonies of evening,
Like clouds in starlight widely spread,
Like memory of music fled,
Like aught that for its grace may be
Dear, and yet dearer for its mystery.
Spirit of BEAUTY, that dost consecrate
With thine own hues all thou dost shine upon
Of human thought or form, where art thou gone?
Why dost thou pass away and leave our state,
This dim vast vale of tears, vacant and desolate?
Ask why the sunlight not for ever
Weaves rainbows o'er yon mountain-river,
Why aught should fail and fade that once is shown,
Why fear and dream and death and birth
Cast on the daylight of this earth
Such gloom, why man has such a scope
For love and hate, despondency and hope?
No voice from some sublimer world hath ever
To sage or poet these responses given:
Therefore the names of God and ghosts and Heaven,
Remain the records of their vain endeavour:
Frail spells whose uttered charm might not avail to sever,
From all we hear and all we see,
Doubt, chance and mutability.
Thy light alone like mist o'er mountains driven,
Or music by the night-wind sent
Through strings of some still instrument,
Or moonlight on a midnight stream,
Gives grace and truth to life's unquiet dream.
Love, Hope, and Self-esteem, like clouds depart
And come, for some uncertain moments lent.
Man were immortal and omnipotent,
Didst thou, unknown and awful as thou art,
Keep with thy glorious train firm state within his heart.
Thou messenger of sympathies,
That wax and wane in lovers' eyes;
Thou, that to human thought art nourishment,
Like darkness to a dying flame!
Depart not as thy shadow came,
Depart not--lest the grave should be,
Like life and fear, a dark reality.
While yet a boy I sought for ghosts, and sped
Through many a listening chamber, cave and ruin,
And starlight wood, with fearful steps pursuing
Hopes of high talk with the departed dead.
I called on poisonous names with which our youth is fed;
I was not heard; I saw them not;
When musing deeply on the lot
Of life, at that sweet time when winds are wooing
All vital things that wake to bring
News of buds and blossoming,
Sudden, thy shadow fell on me;
I shrieked, and clasped my hands in ecstasy!
I vowed that I would dedicate my powers
To thee and thine: have I not kept the vow?
With beating heart and streaming eyes, even now
I call the phantoms of a thousand hours
Each from his voiceless grave: they have in visioned bowers
Of studious zeal or love's delight
Outwatched with me the envious night:
They know that never joy illumed my brow
Unlinked with hope that thou wouldst free
This world from its dark slavery,
That thou, O awful LOVELINESS,
Wouldst give whate'er these words cannot express.
The day becomes more solemn and serene
When noon is past; there is a harmony
In autumn, and a lustre in its sky,
Which through the summer is not heard or seen,
As if it could not be, as if it had not been!
Thus let thy power, which like the truth
Of nature on my passive youth
Descended, to my onward life supply
Its calm, to one who worships thee,
And every form containing thee,
Whom, SPIRIT fair, thy spells did bind
To fear himself, and love all human kind.
The awful shadow of some unseen Power
Floats though unseen among us; visiting
This various world with as inconstant wing
As summer winds that creep from flower to flower;
Like moonbeams that behind some piny mountain shower,
It visits with inconstant glance
Each human heart and countenance;
Like hues and harmonies of evening,
Like clouds in starlight widely spread,
Like memory of music fled,
Like aught that for its grace may be
Dear, and yet dearer for its mystery.
Spirit of BEAUTY, that dost consecrate
With thine own hues all thou dost shine upon
Of human thought or form, where art thou gone?
Why dost thou pass away and leave our state,
This dim vast vale of tears, vacant and desolate?
Ask why the sunlight not for ever
Weaves rainbows o'er yon mountain-river,
Why aught should fail and fade that once is shown,
Why fear and dream and death and birth
Cast on the daylight of this earth
Such gloom, why man has such a scope
For love and hate, despondency and hope?
No voice from some sublimer world hath ever
To sage or poet these responses given:
Therefore the names of God and ghosts and Heaven,
Remain the records of their vain endeavour:
Frail spells whose uttered charm might not avail to sever,
From all we hear and all we see,
Doubt, chance and mutability.
Thy light alone like mist o'er mountains driven,
Or music by the night-wind sent
Through strings of some still instrument,
Or moonlight on a midnight stream,
Gives grace and truth to life's unquiet dream.
Love, Hope, and Self-esteem, like clouds depart
And come, for some uncertain moments lent.
Man were immortal and omnipotent,
Didst thou, unknown and awful as thou art,
Keep with thy glorious train firm state within his heart.
Thou messenger of sympathies,
That wax and wane in lovers' eyes;
Thou, that to human thought art nourishment,
Like darkness to a dying flame!
Depart not as thy shadow came,
Depart not--lest the grave should be,
Like life and fear, a dark reality.
While yet a boy I sought for ghosts, and sped
Through many a listening chamber, cave and ruin,
And starlight wood, with fearful steps pursuing
Hopes of high talk with the departed dead.
I called on poisonous names with which our youth is fed;
I was not heard; I saw them not;
When musing deeply on the lot
Of life, at that sweet time when winds are wooing
All vital things that wake to bring
News of buds and blossoming,
Sudden, thy shadow fell on me;
I shrieked, and clasped my hands in ecstasy!
I vowed that I would dedicate my powers
To thee and thine: have I not kept the vow?
With beating heart and streaming eyes, even now
I call the phantoms of a thousand hours
Each from his voiceless grave: they have in visioned bowers
Of studious zeal or love's delight
Outwatched with me the envious night:
They know that never joy illumed my brow
Unlinked with hope that thou wouldst free
This world from its dark slavery,
That thou, O awful LOVELINESS,
Wouldst give whate'er these words cannot express.
The day becomes more solemn and serene
When noon is past; there is a harmony
In autumn, and a lustre in its sky,
Which through the summer is not heard or seen,
As if it could not be, as if it had not been!
Thus let thy power, which like the truth
Of nature on my passive youth
Descended, to my onward life supply
Its calm, to one who worships thee,
And every form containing thee,
Whom, SPIRIT fair, thy spells did bind
To fear himself, and love all human kind.
Astonishing Revelation(s)
. . .Man, I'm slow. I just realised another reason why I don't find the city of Taipei to be especially beautiful: its exterior resembles the interior of a cheap, low-class restroom. Which is to say, the Taiwanese in Taipei have this morbid obsession with tiles! Tiles cover the faces of a good 50-80% of the buildings I've seen, tiles are what the sidewalks and platforms consist of, tiles are what coat a significant percentage of perimeter walls and tiles are what become moldy and faded from outside humidity.
. . .Ah well. TGIF! Though I'm not sure what's happening tomorrow. I think the fellowship is supposed to meet at church at 9:30am to go nature-hiking, though was it tomorrow or last week.... Hmmm..
. . .Voices. How do I sound? Everybody's voice is unique, huh. Too bad they don't have vocal training courses anymore. There're some certain people (like someone-someone's son) who has this naaasty back-vowel way of speaking everything. And he exhorts everything from the pit of his stomache or something, so the overall result is this nasty self-echoing, loud, course sound. My vocal cords strain just from the thought of speaking like that all the time... Well, I personally suspect that my voice is too nasal, but ehh.........
. . .I could sooo research this for my linguistic thesis for my masters or something! How people in the same linguistic environment end up speaking differently. To hypothesis, why a sister can have a clear, crystal voice, but have a younger brother with a slurred, round voice. Research, research, research.
. . .Need to really cut down on the English TV, and increase my time spent on blogging in Chinese. I also really confused myself the other day with that English class.. which just goes to show that when one doesn't speak a language for a period of time, that language becomes warped. Or does this verify that Mandarin -- the language I spoke before age 5, is truely my mother tongue, and that English is my actual second language? Though such terms are tricky for people of such a young age...
. . . Yah... so I confused myself with "I like to go shopping for some clothes" and wondering why "I like go to eating some icecream" didn't sound right, even though it was basically following the same sentence. But I got it all figured out now. ^_^ I confused myself ove the verb "to like" only because (apparently) I totally forgot about the aux. verb that I sometimes used in my sentences. E.g. "I would like eating chicken" is very wrong, but "I like eating chicken" is acceptable. (though for me personally, I'm still iffy on that one. Not too sure if like is an aux. verb itself, or if it's one of those verbs that's undergoing a grammatical change through the evolution of the English language.
. . .Hmmm..... Class is as usual. Gotta study more! And harder! More! Harder! K, I'll stop before people get mad at me. =P Kinda peeved. Woman-to-my-right-across-the-isle (a.k.a. dexter-woman) got a 93 on that same test, where I only got 84. BOOH! Ah, crap. Forgot to do my hw again...
. . .Whoa... nobody's online... Even those who're usually up by this time are sleeping... Which I guess is a good thing... ...cuz sleep is important, especially for you Ontarian Uni students! =P
. . .Meanwhile, I'm already fretting over my plans for the next two years or so.
-Gotta find an apartment or something cheap and affordable close to UW campus, cuz of my math madness.
-Gotta confirm if a certain friend is certain to be a future housemate.
-gotta find another future possible housemate for alternate terms of aforementioned "certain friend"
-Gotta find a 1~8 hours/week job for my time in UW.
-Gotta learn Chinese!!
. . .ARG!!! K, I stop blogging in English; gonna blog in Chinese now. (and it's probably gonna be as short as ever. grr...)
. . .Ah well. TGIF! Though I'm not sure what's happening tomorrow. I think the fellowship is supposed to meet at church at 9:30am to go nature-hiking, though was it tomorrow or last week.... Hmmm..
. . .Voices. How do I sound? Everybody's voice is unique, huh. Too bad they don't have vocal training courses anymore. There're some certain people (like someone-someone's son) who has this naaasty back-vowel way of speaking everything. And he exhorts everything from the pit of his stomache or something, so the overall result is this nasty self-echoing, loud, course sound. My vocal cords strain just from the thought of speaking like that all the time... Well, I personally suspect that my voice is too nasal, but ehh.........
. . .I could sooo research this for my linguistic thesis for my masters or something! How people in the same linguistic environment end up speaking differently. To hypothesis, why a sister can have a clear, crystal voice, but have a younger brother with a slurred, round voice. Research, research, research.
. . .Need to really cut down on the English TV, and increase my time spent on blogging in Chinese. I also really confused myself the other day with that English class.. which just goes to show that when one doesn't speak a language for a period of time, that language becomes warped. Or does this verify that Mandarin -- the language I spoke before age 5, is truely my mother tongue, and that English is my actual second language? Though such terms are tricky for people of such a young age...
. . . Yah... so I confused myself with "I like to go shopping for some clothes" and wondering why "I like go to eating some icecream" didn't sound right, even though it was basically following the same sentence. But I got it all figured out now. ^_^ I confused myself ove the verb "to like" only because (apparently) I totally forgot about the aux. verb that I sometimes used in my sentences. E.g. "I would like eating chicken" is very wrong, but "I like eating chicken" is acceptable. (though for me personally, I'm still iffy on that one. Not too sure if like is an aux. verb itself, or if it's one of those verbs that's undergoing a grammatical change through the evolution of the English language.
. . .Hmmm..... Class is as usual. Gotta study more! And harder! More! Harder! K, I'll stop before people get mad at me. =P Kinda peeved. Woman-to-my-right-across-the-isle (a.k.a. dexter-woman) got a 93 on that same test, where I only got 84. BOOH! Ah, crap. Forgot to do my hw again...
. . .Whoa... nobody's online... Even those who're usually up by this time are sleeping... Which I guess is a good thing... ...cuz sleep is important, especially for you Ontarian Uni students! =P
. . .Meanwhile, I'm already fretting over my plans for the next two years or so.
-Gotta find an apartment or something cheap and affordable close to UW campus, cuz of my math madness.
-Gotta confirm if a certain friend is certain to be a future housemate.
-gotta find another future possible housemate for alternate terms of aforementioned "certain friend"
-Gotta find a 1~8 hours/week job for my time in UW.
-Gotta learn Chinese!!
. . .ARG!!! K, I stop blogging in English; gonna blog in Chinese now. (and it's probably gonna be as short as ever. grr...)
2003/11/20
Staggered Sleep
. . .So I finally received another letter last night from Shells, in that hilarious blue plastic envelope. What's with the scotch tape, eh? =P Anyways, I got home around 11:00pm or so, and was writing a response, so I didn't get to sleep 'til a bit after midnight. And then, just after a really disturbing dream, (of the sort where someone you'd rather not talk to again for the rest of your life is having an MSN conversation with you), I woke up at 5:00am, without an alarm clock! Oi... Flushed a small cockaroach down the drain, took a shower, came out smelling soapy-fresh, and sat in front of the TV, finishing my letter.
. . .Went down to the convenience store at like 5:30 to get some breakfast, and the guy was obviously sleepy.. he was like, tripping over the counter, and didn't catch my change when I was paying for my drink and noodles. (hehe.. yah, instant noodles for breakfast.. Mmmm....)
. . .School was ok, though I felt that too much class time was wasted. Afterwards, after getting really lost, I finally got to chat with the head of the English department at "National Taiwan Normal University". Nice name, eh? It's 'cooler' in Chinese. haha. Not sure how exactly they translated it. Aaaanyways, if only I had a working permit in Taiwan, he said I'd be perfect for hiring in the English Language Training Centre. Yarg.
. . .Apparently, I first need a resident visa to get a working permit, and it'd appear that I'd have had to have applied for this visa while still abroad(not in Taiwan). No fun at all. And the other problem is, I don't really know how likely it'd be for me to actually work there; if there'd be any openings and stuff.
. . .But I think my chances for auditing their Mandarin classes are kinda shot... ...administration wasn't as nice to me as the English department was... *sniff*
. . .The head of the English department was cool though. He was pretty friendly, and apparently, he spent some time in the states, which made English conversation so much easier for me. ^_^
. . .Meanwhile.............................................
. . .Went down to the convenience store at like 5:30 to get some breakfast, and the guy was obviously sleepy.. he was like, tripping over the counter, and didn't catch my change when I was paying for my drink and noodles. (hehe.. yah, instant noodles for breakfast.. Mmmm....)
. . .School was ok, though I felt that too much class time was wasted. Afterwards, after getting really lost, I finally got to chat with the head of the English department at "National Taiwan Normal University". Nice name, eh? It's 'cooler' in Chinese. haha. Not sure how exactly they translated it. Aaaanyways, if only I had a working permit in Taiwan, he said I'd be perfect for hiring in the English Language Training Centre. Yarg.
. . .Apparently, I first need a resident visa to get a working permit, and it'd appear that I'd have had to have applied for this visa while still abroad(not in Taiwan). No fun at all. And the other problem is, I don't really know how likely it'd be for me to actually work there; if there'd be any openings and stuff.
. . .But I think my chances for auditing their Mandarin classes are kinda shot... ...administration wasn't as nice to me as the English department was... *sniff*
. . .The head of the English department was cool though. He was pretty friendly, and apparently, he spent some time in the states, which made English conversation so much easier for me. ^_^
. . .Meanwhile.............................................
2003/11/19
Yay!
. . .I think I stole someone's straw this morning at the convenience store while I was buying a drink... But meh, they're free anyways. And the store clerks already think I'm weird, so nothing lost there, really. =P
. . .DAMMIT!! Got 84% on my third test this morning. And I soo didn't deserve it either. I could see all those pity marks... *sniff* But it's all good... I guess. Since I'm doing so poorly in school, I figured I have to go back and make myself memorize those 50~100 words a day... Sadly, it's the only way I'll learn. And 'sides, it'll only make me sound smarter and stuff, riiiiiight? (hopefully...)
. . .Woke up this morning, looked in the mirror and realized that I'm actually gaining fat underneath my chin! Ahh... gotta find DDR machine and fast!
. . .Meanwhile, I can feel all this junk I've been eating is starting to affect my system. (junk = Tao Bai Ren's cooking, system=scent.) I can actually tell that I smell different from how I did in UW. Part of it might have to deal with the detergent for my clothes though... don't like that scent either. ...And i especially hate using the washroom after my uncle's been in there.. he's deaf and uh...scent-deaf as well. So it's like a minefield, trying to shield my poor nose from the nasty, nasty scent of an almost-if-not-already-60-year old Chinese man.
. . .Meanwhile, I've been thinking about cutting my hair... don't know if I've already blogged about this, but meh. I mean, it was fun while it lasted, but I'm running out of hairties and stuff, and waking up with 2 minutes to spare isn't the best for grooming. I always end up looking like crap for class... *sighs* Ah well. I'm there to learn, not court. ;)
. . .Speaking of which, I'm suddenly reminded of something I realized last night after a surprise phone conversation with a guy friend. Apparently, when making friends, I don't seem to place a particular stress between the difference between males and females. Which is to say, unlike this guy friend of mine, I don't treat guy friends as friends, and lady friends as potential partners, but I treat both as friends. Which might explain why a certain woman on this side of the world is acting so funny...
. . .But seriously! I'm not saying that guys and girls don't have any differences, but rather, I feel that the differences lie in one's perception -- it's there if you perceive it to be there. I mean, everybody's an individual, and if they're strong advocates for the stereotypes, then I guess they're more of an induhvidual, huh... (again, borrowed term from Scott Adams, creator of the Dilbert comic strip.)
. . .Afterall, if I were to use this strange perception to regard my friends, I wouldn't really be friends with the females, would I. I mean, I'd be this snide insincere pervert who's only acting nice, waiting for the oppertunity to jump into her pants. Whereas, I can choose to see people as people, and actually try to connect with them on an intellectual and emotional level. But alas, most guys don't really seem keen on talking about emotions... it's all about guffawing at fellow men's idiocy, poisoning themselves with alcohol or other more leathal substances, whistling to female pedestrians and expensive vehicles and encouraging each other's contemptable qualities.
. . .Am I generalizing right now? Maybe. But believe you me, I have seen such people before. And I didn't like it one bit.
. . .Aaaaanyways.... I gotta get ready for my English conversation lesson today... I have 45 minutes left. whee...
. . .DAMMIT!! Got 84% on my third test this morning. And I soo didn't deserve it either. I could see all those pity marks... *sniff* But it's all good... I guess. Since I'm doing so poorly in school, I figured I have to go back and make myself memorize those 50~100 words a day... Sadly, it's the only way I'll learn. And 'sides, it'll only make me sound smarter and stuff, riiiiiight? (hopefully...)
. . .Woke up this morning, looked in the mirror and realized that I'm actually gaining fat underneath my chin! Ahh... gotta find DDR machine and fast!
. . .Meanwhile, I can feel all this junk I've been eating is starting to affect my system. (junk = Tao Bai Ren's cooking, system=scent.) I can actually tell that I smell different from how I did in UW. Part of it might have to deal with the detergent for my clothes though... don't like that scent either. ...And i especially hate using the washroom after my uncle's been in there.. he's deaf and uh...scent-deaf as well. So it's like a minefield, trying to shield my poor nose from the nasty, nasty scent of an almost-if-not-already-60-year old Chinese man.
. . .Meanwhile, I've been thinking about cutting my hair... don't know if I've already blogged about this, but meh. I mean, it was fun while it lasted, but I'm running out of hairties and stuff, and waking up with 2 minutes to spare isn't the best for grooming. I always end up looking like crap for class... *sighs* Ah well. I'm there to learn, not court. ;)
. . .Speaking of which, I'm suddenly reminded of something I realized last night after a surprise phone conversation with a guy friend. Apparently, when making friends, I don't seem to place a particular stress between the difference between males and females. Which is to say, unlike this guy friend of mine, I don't treat guy friends as friends, and lady friends as potential partners, but I treat both as friends. Which might explain why a certain woman on this side of the world is acting so funny...
. . .But seriously! I'm not saying that guys and girls don't have any differences, but rather, I feel that the differences lie in one's perception -- it's there if you perceive it to be there. I mean, everybody's an individual, and if they're strong advocates for the stereotypes, then I guess they're more of an induhvidual, huh... (again, borrowed term from Scott Adams, creator of the Dilbert comic strip.)
. . .Afterall, if I were to use this strange perception to regard my friends, I wouldn't really be friends with the females, would I. I mean, I'd be this snide insincere pervert who's only acting nice, waiting for the oppertunity to jump into her pants. Whereas, I can choose to see people as people, and actually try to connect with them on an intellectual and emotional level. But alas, most guys don't really seem keen on talking about emotions... it's all about guffawing at fellow men's idiocy, poisoning themselves with alcohol or other more leathal substances, whistling to female pedestrians and expensive vehicles and encouraging each other's contemptable qualities.
. . .Am I generalizing right now? Maybe. But believe you me, I have seen such people before. And I didn't like it one bit.
. . .Aaaaanyways.... I gotta get ready for my English conversation lesson today... I have 45 minutes left. whee...
2003/11/18
Yin Yang
. . .eww... Creative writing is one thing, but that excuse-of-a-poem didn't really end up being terribly happy, eh? Hmm...
. . .Meanwhile, class is turing out really fun! We're learning a bit about "Romance of Three Kingdoms", which, funnily enough, is actually pretty cool. So kudos to you, Frank! hehe. Though I still insist that Zhou Yu is cooler than the other old fogey. =P
. . .That Chinese novel I'm reading I'm also disliking more and more. I mean, ew!! Ick. There's barely any decency or concept of morality, ethics, principles. It's about as clean as Dawson's Creek -- where everybody's sleeping with each other. Until they've exhaused all possible permutations, so they're forced to introduce more characters to keep the sex going. Grr.
. . .I'm definately reading Romance of 3 Kingdoms afterwards! No more slutty Chinese-Canadian women for me! Ew. The most annoying/perturbing/disturbing thing is that it's written in the first person of a 24-year old female. And the author's an old man. Supposedly really learnéd and all with his PhD, and experience in HK, Taiwan, Vancouver, Toronto, France, etc., but I'm not impressed at all. I think it's nasty and wrong for old men to write as if they're young women. Eww.. I mean, even if he did have the insight and err.. 'experience'... it's just wrong!!! Maybe because that photo of him really turns me off. Whenever I pull out the book to trudge through some more, I'm like "ew,ew,ew... don't look at the picture, don't look at the picture, don't look at the picture...."
. . .Had a really interesting chat about genetics, parenting and childhood memories with a friend of mine. Too bad there's a 13-hour time difference or I'd probably still be chatting about it now with her. Haha.
. . .Meanwhile, class is turing out really fun! We're learning a bit about "Romance of Three Kingdoms", which, funnily enough, is actually pretty cool. So kudos to you, Frank! hehe. Though I still insist that Zhou Yu is cooler than the other old fogey. =P
. . .That Chinese novel I'm reading I'm also disliking more and more. I mean, ew!! Ick. There's barely any decency or concept of morality, ethics, principles. It's about as clean as Dawson's Creek -- where everybody's sleeping with each other. Until they've exhaused all possible permutations, so they're forced to introduce more characters to keep the sex going. Grr.
. . .I'm definately reading Romance of 3 Kingdoms afterwards! No more slutty Chinese-Canadian women for me! Ew. The most annoying/perturbing/disturbing thing is that it's written in the first person of a 24-year old female. And the author's an old man. Supposedly really learnéd and all with his PhD, and experience in HK, Taiwan, Vancouver, Toronto, France, etc., but I'm not impressed at all. I think it's nasty and wrong for old men to write as if they're young women. Eww.. I mean, even if he did have the insight and err.. 'experience'... it's just wrong!!! Maybe because that photo of him really turns me off. Whenever I pull out the book to trudge through some more, I'm like "ew,ew,ew... don't look at the picture, don't look at the picture, don't look at the picture...."
. . .Had a really interesting chat about genetics, parenting and childhood memories with a friend of mine. Too bad there's a 13-hour time difference or I'd probably still be chatting about it now with her. Haha.
Crapulence
. . .it's a work in progress. Not terribly coherent, nor does it have very clear rhythm, but there *is* some sort of meaning behind it.. ... if you guys care to try to glean its purpose. =P
An Angel Feather's Flight
I free myself from ties of root
and start to slowly flutter out,
and downwards to a foreign land
Chaotic spiral tracks of trout.
I see the sea from whence I came,
strangely familiar despite its colours,
and eagerly into my home I plunge
to eagerly learn and earn its favour.
But as I swam within this sea,
I found that there was more than home
the shadow seemed to've followed me
and covered everything 'til I was 'lone.
I bravely stood against the darkness,
defiant in its face of rage,
but as time went by my light grew dim,
sighing defeat I acknowledged my age,
That I was far too old to continue this war,
for this shadow had been there since my conception.
But just before I was entirely submerged,
a glimmering light pierced through the eternity,
a ray of hope with tides of friendship
gave birth to a new bundle of energy.
I eagerly raced towards this light,
wishing to embrace this newfound friend
just to find that in its stead
stood two different lights at opposite ends.
And as I raced towards this light,
hoping to find some sort of solace,
this light faded away to reveal
that I've been chasing mere phantoms' face.
"WHY?!" cried I to the endless dark
"must I always be alone?"
but all that answered was the steady calm
of the foreboding shadow without a dawn.
After weeping I looked about
towards all those shimmering lights.
And with tears in my eyes I said silently to them,
"this shall be our last night."
I flew one last time about in this sea,
making sure I hadn't missed anyone.
And when I was satisfied I submitted myself
to the eternal darkness that summoned.
and start to slowly flutter out,
and downwards to a foreign land
Chaotic spiral tracks of trout.
I see the sea from whence I came,
strangely familiar despite its colours,
and eagerly into my home I plunge
to eagerly learn and earn its favour.
But as I swam within this sea,
I found that there was more than home
the shadow seemed to've followed me
and covered everything 'til I was 'lone.
I bravely stood against the darkness,
defiant in its face of rage,
but as time went by my light grew dim,
sighing defeat I acknowledged my age,
That I was far too old to continue this war,
for this shadow had been there since my conception.
But just before I was entirely submerged,
a glimmering light pierced through the eternity,
a ray of hope with tides of friendship
gave birth to a new bundle of energy.
I eagerly raced towards this light,
wishing to embrace this newfound friend
just to find that in its stead
stood two different lights at opposite ends.
And as I raced towards this light,
hoping to find some sort of solace,
this light faded away to reveal
that I've been chasing mere phantoms' face.
"WHY?!" cried I to the endless dark
"must I always be alone?"
but all that answered was the steady calm
of the foreboding shadow without a dawn.
After weeping I looked about
towards all those shimmering lights.
And with tears in my eyes I said silently to them,
"this shall be our last night."
I flew one last time about in this sea,
making sure I hadn't missed anyone.
And when I was satisfied I submitted myself
to the eternal darkness that summoned.
2003/11/17
Sparkle
. . .K, I've successfully shaken off that previous feeling of disorientation, as well as any feeling in my left leg. (I should sit more properly, huh.) So yah. Despite that nasty old man, I'm still pretty happy today. And I'm not sure why. It's not like today was extraordinary, nor was it out of the ordinary, but for some reason, I'm feeling pretty good.
. . .Part of it might have to deal with the fact that two people opened up to me. Well, not really, and not entirely, but they did in a sense, which made me feel good. Not in the sense that I'm rejoicing at their misfortune, but rather at the fact that they feel close enough or trust me enough to impart these feelings and experiences with me.
. . .And while I'm sure they feel it's nothing -- that these things are so insubstatial that it's no big deal talking about them, it does make a difference to me. Especially when I have the emotional age of a child. Haha.. yah, I admit it. Like I wrote in an earlier post, when you smile, I smile; when you scowl, I scowl. When I'm ignored, I'm sad; when people talk to me, I'm happy. Unless they're talking about how bad I am in which case I'm back to being sad.
. . .Suddenly panicked about school again. I thought I had left the math world behind, but other factors (including the influence of my aunt and the need for physical food) have led me to reconsider my initial haste, and turned me 'round back to math. So, I'll graduate with an Honours BMath (which means I'll have to suffer through CS 133), and a BIS (which'll hopefully help me into UBC for ling.)
. . .Yeeesh. With all this school, I think it'd be healthier for me to get married before I finish getting my Doctorate... which at the earliest would be when I'm 27. (Assuming my work is brilliant enough for them to allow me to skip getting a Masters.) Though if I'm busy with research during the most crutial years of my child's life, I'm also afraid I'll end up a terrible father... *sighs* Well, it's not like I can plan on when I'm going to meet that special someone anyways. It's just a scary thought -- fathering someone at the age of 27 or older.
. . .Part of it might have to deal with the fact that two people opened up to me. Well, not really, and not entirely, but they did in a sense, which made me feel good. Not in the sense that I'm rejoicing at their misfortune, but rather at the fact that they feel close enough or trust me enough to impart these feelings and experiences with me.
. . .And while I'm sure they feel it's nothing -- that these things are so insubstatial that it's no big deal talking about them, it does make a difference to me. Especially when I have the emotional age of a child. Haha.. yah, I admit it. Like I wrote in an earlier post, when you smile, I smile; when you scowl, I scowl. When I'm ignored, I'm sad; when people talk to me, I'm happy. Unless they're talking about how bad I am in which case I'm back to being sad.
. . .Suddenly panicked about school again. I thought I had left the math world behind, but other factors (including the influence of my aunt and the need for physical food) have led me to reconsider my initial haste, and turned me 'round back to math. So, I'll graduate with an Honours BMath (which means I'll have to suffer through CS 133), and a BIS (which'll hopefully help me into UBC for ling.)
. . .Yeeesh. With all this school, I think it'd be healthier for me to get married before I finish getting my Doctorate... which at the earliest would be when I'm 27. (Assuming my work is brilliant enough for them to allow me to skip getting a Masters.) Though if I'm busy with research during the most crutial years of my child's life, I'm also afraid I'll end up a terrible father... *sighs* Well, it's not like I can plan on when I'm going to meet that special someone anyways. It's just a scary thought -- fathering someone at the age of 27 or older.
Hack, Slash and Bash
. . .So a friend just recently directed my attention to www.bash.org, which turned out to be pretty funny. (Well, some of it anyways. Some of it was really nasty, and the other third was pretty crude.)
. . .Well, my weekend was pretty good. Did some shopping on Friday night -- got two new tops and a really thin, white jacket which I've yet to have the oppertunity to try out. =D
. . .My saturday was pretty good -- I made some personal breakthroughs with Chinese grammar and also made up for all the sleep I missed during the week. Didn't end up gong anywhere at all, but I did manage to sit in front of the TV until 2:00am or so.
. . .Sunday I sorta... ... overslept... ... ... and yah... For the rest of the day, I pretty much sat in front of the TV as well, using the commercial breaks to doodle in my notebook. I mean err... "studying" yessss....
That night wasn't too great; either I shouldn't have finished that entire tube of Pringles or God wasn't pleased at me missing church, but whatever it was, I ended up going to bed with a tummyache... ...the kind that made me feel like throwing up... and made me ghastly pale.
. . .This morning was pretty cool -- because of an allusion in this essay, we ended up talking about "Romance of Three Kingdoms" and the actual history behind it. I still think Zhou Yu is cool, even though he was a bit.. umm... insecure about his intelligence. Hehe.
. . .This afternoon, however, was a little more disturbing. There was this 50-year old balding fat man who was (hopefully) a client of my uncle's. I had to break their conversation because of an incoming phone call for my uncle. So there was me sitting at my computer, laughing out loud at the odd moment. But yah. Suddenly, this client saunters up to me and presents me with his business card.
me: "oh... thank ... you...(?)"
him: "so, how long have you grown your hair?"
me: "Err... about 4 years now?"
him: "wow, it's so beautiful..."
me: *mentally cringing*
. . .So now I have a Chinese business card from a strange Chinese man. Meanwhile, on the animal farm...
. . .Well, my weekend was pretty good. Did some shopping on Friday night -- got two new tops and a really thin, white jacket which I've yet to have the oppertunity to try out. =D
. . .My saturday was pretty good -- I made some personal breakthroughs with Chinese grammar and also made up for all the sleep I missed during the week. Didn't end up gong anywhere at all, but I did manage to sit in front of the TV until 2:00am or so.
. . .Sunday I sorta... ... overslept... ... ... and yah... For the rest of the day, I pretty much sat in front of the TV as well, using the commercial breaks to doodle in my notebook. I mean err... "studying" yessss....
That night wasn't too great; either I shouldn't have finished that entire tube of Pringles or God wasn't pleased at me missing church, but whatever it was, I ended up going to bed with a tummyache... ...the kind that made me feel like throwing up... and made me ghastly pale.
. . .This morning was pretty cool -- because of an allusion in this essay, we ended up talking about "Romance of Three Kingdoms" and the actual history behind it. I still think Zhou Yu is cool, even though he was a bit.. umm... insecure about his intelligence. Hehe.
. . .This afternoon, however, was a little more disturbing. There was this 50-year old balding fat man who was (hopefully) a client of my uncle's. I had to break their conversation because of an incoming phone call for my uncle. So there was me sitting at my computer, laughing out loud at the odd moment. But yah. Suddenly, this client saunters up to me and presents me with his business card.
me: "oh... thank ... you...(?)"
him: "so, how long have you grown your hair?"
me: "Err... about 4 years now?"
him: "wow, it's so beautiful..."
me: *mentally cringing*
. . .So now I have a Chinese business card from a strange Chinese man. Meanwhile, on the animal farm...
2003/11/14
Fashionable Taste
. . .I just came to the sudden realization that I have little if any taste in fashion at all!
. . .This realization dawned on me just now while I was sitting here, trying to design an autumn jacket for myself, and thinking about shopping in a local night market. Apparently, I'd enjoy wearing almost any namebrand? Or is that so? All the newer stuff I've bought (and I think look good on me) are actually name-brands. And while I'm quite selective in the store, I still find that I'm not exactly a fashion fountain of ideas. All the characters in my sketchbook are wearing something relatively unimaginative -- either something so neutral that anybody could be wearing it, or a poor imitation of centuries-old fashion.
. . .It's very alarming, when one realizes that one's imagination is nothing more than a hollow imitation of someone else's originality. Or am I being premature about all this?
. . .I suppose I should wait 'til tomorrow -- after I go shopping, to see whether I just blindly follow whatever's on display in the brandname stores, or if I do indeed have a personal sense of taste.
. . .But in the meanwhile, I gotta build up my biceps and delts, etc if I want to get away with wearing a black, sleeveless double-fold turtleneck top/sweater. =P
. . . . . .UPDATE 5:58pm (my time)
. . .So I was doodling in my minisketchbook, and I've decided to sacrifice it in the name of fashion. So hopefully, starting next week, I'll find out a way to post my lil' ideas, completely open for criticism/comments. And if I somehow become devoted enough, it might even get its own lil' blog corner. =D So right now I'm playing with colour concepts for a certain autumn jacket I'm designing.
. . .This realization dawned on me just now while I was sitting here, trying to design an autumn jacket for myself, and thinking about shopping in a local night market. Apparently, I'd enjoy wearing almost any namebrand? Or is that so? All the newer stuff I've bought (and I think look good on me) are actually name-brands. And while I'm quite selective in the store, I still find that I'm not exactly a fashion fountain of ideas. All the characters in my sketchbook are wearing something relatively unimaginative -- either something so neutral that anybody could be wearing it, or a poor imitation of centuries-old fashion.
. . .It's very alarming, when one realizes that one's imagination is nothing more than a hollow imitation of someone else's originality. Or am I being premature about all this?
. . .I suppose I should wait 'til tomorrow -- after I go shopping, to see whether I just blindly follow whatever's on display in the brandname stores, or if I do indeed have a personal sense of taste.
. . .But in the meanwhile, I gotta build up my biceps and delts, etc if I want to get away with wearing a black, sleeveless double-fold turtleneck top/sweater. =P
. . . . . .UPDATE 5:58pm (my time)
. . .So I was doodling in my minisketchbook, and I've decided to sacrifice it in the name of fashion. So hopefully, starting next week, I'll find out a way to post my lil' ideas, completely open for criticism/comments. And if I somehow become devoted enough, it might even get its own lil' blog corner. =D So right now I'm playing with colour concepts for a certain autumn jacket I'm designing.
Angel Tears
. . .Don't you just hate seeing something terrible happen while you're just standing by and watching it happen? Don't you feel worse when you try to help, but you just end up making things more complicated?
. . .I've been in this position more than once, and I still have no idea how best to handle the situations. It makes me wonder how me, a person with very limited social skills, can successfully befriend two different people who would like nothing better than to kill each other.
. . .And so I'm standing there, trying to figure out the situation, only to learn that this "lovers' quarrel" is nothing more than miscommunication.
. . .But the idiocy on my part is this bloated ego of mine that convinces me that I can make everything right and A-o.k. So I go ahead, talk to both parties to figure out what they think of the other person. And sometimes, it turns out that they're looking at totally different things. E.g. maybe the first person thinks that language is important, and the other person thinks that actions are important. So the first person is mad at the second person for not speaking well, and the second person is mad at the first person for not being more careful with body language.
. . .Of course, those are only stupid examples to illustrate my point. So the first person doesn't want to tell the second person that the second person's speech bugs the first person. And the second person doesn't want to tell the first person that the first person's body language is offensive to the second person.
. . .And it's not like I can tell them for them because I'm already sworn to secrecy. But then it's not like they're ever gonna resolve it between themselves because neither is the type to go up and have a talk, getting everything out into the open.
. . .*sighs* I just hate standing by, not being able to do anything and see a friendship whither because neither is willing to give sunlight or water to the once budding flower of their friendship.
. . .Meanwhile, OATUS(On A Totally Unrelated Subject), I've just caught wind of a DVD movie that Squaresoft-Enix is releasing in summer 2004 (in Japan). It's called "Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children". After watching the 12 Mb trailer, I'm hooked already!!!! Though Sephiroth doesn't look as pretty as he did in the PS game. =P For 'more' on the subject (which isn't right now cuz they're still making the website), please visit http://www.square-enix.co.jp/dvd/ff7ac/
. . .Well, that's all for now. Something about an oral test on Monday on this essay thing we're studying right now.
. . .I've been in this position more than once, and I still have no idea how best to handle the situations. It makes me wonder how me, a person with very limited social skills, can successfully befriend two different people who would like nothing better than to kill each other.
. . .And so I'm standing there, trying to figure out the situation, only to learn that this "lovers' quarrel" is nothing more than miscommunication.
. . .But the idiocy on my part is this bloated ego of mine that convinces me that I can make everything right and A-o.k. So I go ahead, talk to both parties to figure out what they think of the other person. And sometimes, it turns out that they're looking at totally different things. E.g. maybe the first person thinks that language is important, and the other person thinks that actions are important. So the first person is mad at the second person for not speaking well, and the second person is mad at the first person for not being more careful with body language.
. . .Of course, those are only stupid examples to illustrate my point. So the first person doesn't want to tell the second person that the second person's speech bugs the first person. And the second person doesn't want to tell the first person that the first person's body language is offensive to the second person.
. . .And it's not like I can tell them for them because I'm already sworn to secrecy. But then it's not like they're ever gonna resolve it between themselves because neither is the type to go up and have a talk, getting everything out into the open.
. . .*sighs* I just hate standing by, not being able to do anything and see a friendship whither because neither is willing to give sunlight or water to the once budding flower of their friendship.
. . .Meanwhile, OATUS(On A Totally Unrelated Subject), I've just caught wind of a DVD movie that Squaresoft-Enix is releasing in summer 2004 (in Japan). It's called "Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children". After watching the 12 Mb trailer, I'm hooked already!!!! Though Sephiroth doesn't look as pretty as he did in the PS game. =P For 'more' on the subject (which isn't right now cuz they're still making the website), please visit http://www.square-enix.co.jp/dvd/ff7ac/
. . .Well, that's all for now. Something about an oral test on Monday on this essay thing we're studying right now.
2003/11/13
A River Flows
. . .So I haven't really blogged in the last little while, huh. Two days ago I had this loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong talk with Tao Bai Ren about society, what's the 'best' way to act/be, how to treat other people, etiquette, differences between western and eastern mentalities and why she shouldn't make assumptions about me.
. . .And it was so long that she made me miss an episode of my lil' Chinese show.
. . .Anyways. Yesterday was my second lesson with the kiddies. Kevin was a lot less focused. And Vivian seemed pretty keen. I taught them a bit about weather and reviewed dates, so hopefully, they can now say what kind of day it is. (e.g. "cloudy, freezing, warm, dry, etc.")
. . .I think tomorrow the teacher wants me to sing for the class to determine whether the class should go as a whole for some sort of singing competition.
. . .And as you can see, I'm not terribly witty or senscient right now.... *thud*
. . .And it was so long that she made me miss an episode of my lil' Chinese show.
. . .Anyways. Yesterday was my second lesson with the kiddies. Kevin was a lot less focused. And Vivian seemed pretty keen. I taught them a bit about weather and reviewed dates, so hopefully, they can now say what kind of day it is. (e.g. "cloudy, freezing, warm, dry, etc.")
. . .I think tomorrow the teacher wants me to sing for the class to determine whether the class should go as a whole for some sort of singing competition.
. . .And as you can see, I'm not terribly witty or senscient right now.... *thud*
2003/11/11
Phoenix!
. . .Ew, not the American city. Just woke up from a lil' 5-minute nap. Amazing how refreshing a few minutes of rest'll do for your conciousness. ^_^ so yah.
. . .So yersterday after class, I camped out at "Daan Park" (大安森林公園) for a few hours, reading that Chinese novel. (I'm now at page 95. How sad is that, eh??) So while feeling slightly frustrated at my slow reading speed of Chinese (even though I know it's both a combination of not knowing enough words as well as familiarity of simply reading in a different 'medium' as it were, from English.
. . .Anyways, at around 1:00pm, I headed back to the University to sit in to my teacher's beginners' class, to try to pick up some teaching techniques for kiddies. It was sooo slow. But I guess they're supposed to start off slow, right? I got some strange looks from the British student (he looked about 56 years old), and some from the Indonesian boys, but that was about it.
. . .A 48-ish American man seemed to be getting really lost, so I offered to help. But he didn't really want any. And the teacher didn't understand English, so she couldn't really communicate with him. So after getting impatient at the constant miscommunication (it's quite interesting, being fluent in both languages and seeing them not being able to get their points across), I intervened and resolved the issue in like, 2 minutes.
. . .Afterwards, I was asked to help translate some short dialogues for the school -- it was apparently a lesson plan introducing the concept of "best". I did that, and also acted as interpreter for the American... He was apparently quite frustrated and almost angry at the speed of the class, feeling that he wasn't able to catch up to the rest of the class. Anyways, eventually, a sort of extra-help thing was set up so I hope that goes well. It's funny though. He was saying how he was already getting help from someone with a PhD... ...but that person had a PhD in math.. And I think it's pretty universal how linguistics tie with mathematics. (see previous entry.)
. . .I'd offer to help, but I don't think he feels he needs any more.. Since he says he already has a lot of native speakers helping him. Though, of course, the more seasoned reader of my blog should already know my opinion of just getting any random native speaker as a substitutionary teacher. As I already said to him, although the native speaker will be able to tell what sounds right and what doesn't, it doesn't mean that they'll be able to grammatically (and nay, linguistically) quantify why something is valid or not. Though from what I've seen in the university, those people don't really know English either, so I question their ability to cater to the needs of the English-speaking true beginner.
. . .This sorta just made me think about learning in general -- is it better to start from many sources and sorta go through a filter process, ending with only the best sources, or is it better to start with one source, at least getting consistency in education, and later finding later sources to perhaps verify or correct past flaws in one's initial education?
. . .Run-on sentence, I know. Ahaha. But seriously. Come to think of it, I've largely relied on myself for learning mostly anything, which a dear friend of mine says is an admirable quality (something about having the supposed self-discipline to stick to something)... ...and something about being "always so dedicated to whatever [I'm] into at the moment".
. . .Yay for me, I suppose, but gives me a horrible basis to figure out how exactly to be a good teacher. Since I've basically been my own teacher. heh. Though I find that a lot of it has to do with personality and humour. My Writer's Craft teacher was always fun, but my OAC English teacher was ... ... well, she's been described as an 80-year old, hemorrhoid lesbian. ... .. with a nasty, scaly hide. I know, I'm not too generous when it comes to describing people I don't like. but you've gotta appreciate the diction, no?
. . .I mean, the ability to articulate one's thoughts into real words instead of a combination of sounds and actions is what I find to be a true sign of fluency in a language.
. . .So by following that definition, I'd most definately be fluent in English (which my Writers Craft teacher said too. "Very fluent, I'd say!" he said. But in Chinese... I'd have to say I'm merely 'proficient'. Most people are like, "just being able to be understood is good enough" as if I'm supposed to take comfort in knowing that my Chinese isn't perfect. But just give me 5 years of uninterrupted study and I can almost guarentee I'll easily surpass at least 70% of the Mandarin-speaking population.
. . .What I actually find most entertaining is people whose native language is English, who don't know English very thoroughly, and are already trying to becoming something totally different. (A certain classmate in my Japanese class comes to mind...) He had amazing Japanese diction (pure dictionary work, in my opinion), but he couldn't hope to properly speak, both because he didn't have enough practice, and also because he hadn't properly grasped the differing concepts of time in either language. (e.g. the difference between "I have eaten an apple" and "I ate an apple")
. . .Not that I'm criticizing him or anything... ... learning another language is already an admirable act, regardless of one's abiltiy and adaptability to alternate linguistic modes of thinking. (If that term doesn't already exist, I'm sooo making it one when I get my PhD in Linguistics.) =P
. . .In a linguistics book I picked up once, it said that everything is translatable from one language to another, with varying degrees of literary elegance and effeciency. Which is very often why words are 'borrowed' from one language to another. (though it's not like they're ever gonna return them....)
. . .For me, a word should only properly be termed as borrowed if it's used in place of a native word, while they're trying to make their own word for it. E.g. In Japanese, "Baseball" can be considered a borrowed word, because now they've tossed it back to English; they have their own word for it now. (Yakyuu -- 野球)
. . .Otherwise, I think a more appropriate term is "assimilated" or "adapted", though I suppose the former sounds too intimiating. (As if "accusative" doesn't to describe Latin grammar.)
. . .Aaaaanyways, back to my point. So yah, learning languages is a real challenge, no matter who you are. (Unless you're me. In which case it's just expected. lol)
. . .So after my tedious literal translation of that short dialogue (which is so wrong for so many different reasons), I went back to reading that Chinese novel... (at page 95/377... I have like, another few months to go... Man, I feel so... .... normal. Ew... make that feeling go away!!!)
. . .I'm feeling pretty happy. Both friends finally received my letters. ^_^ One of them, Alison, showed it to her roommate, who was apparently, absolutely shocked at the umm... non-conformist standards I had from most males' penmanship. (If indeed most males can be said to possess any form of penmanship at all.)
. . .And my conversation with her ended up with both of us trying to figure out what the antonym of personification is. Poly-something-morphism. yess.. lol.. help me out here, anybody... Anybody??? =D
. . .So yersterday after class, I camped out at "Daan Park" (大安森林公園) for a few hours, reading that Chinese novel. (I'm now at page 95. How sad is that, eh??) So while feeling slightly frustrated at my slow reading speed of Chinese (even though I know it's both a combination of not knowing enough words as well as familiarity of simply reading in a different 'medium' as it were, from English.
. . .Anyways, at around 1:00pm, I headed back to the University to sit in to my teacher's beginners' class, to try to pick up some teaching techniques for kiddies. It was sooo slow. But I guess they're supposed to start off slow, right? I got some strange looks from the British student (he looked about 56 years old), and some from the Indonesian boys, but that was about it.
. . .A 48-ish American man seemed to be getting really lost, so I offered to help. But he didn't really want any. And the teacher didn't understand English, so she couldn't really communicate with him. So after getting impatient at the constant miscommunication (it's quite interesting, being fluent in both languages and seeing them not being able to get their points across), I intervened and resolved the issue in like, 2 minutes.
. . .Afterwards, I was asked to help translate some short dialogues for the school -- it was apparently a lesson plan introducing the concept of "best". I did that, and also acted as interpreter for the American... He was apparently quite frustrated and almost angry at the speed of the class, feeling that he wasn't able to catch up to the rest of the class. Anyways, eventually, a sort of extra-help thing was set up so I hope that goes well. It's funny though. He was saying how he was already getting help from someone with a PhD... ...but that person had a PhD in math.. And I think it's pretty universal how linguistics tie with mathematics. (see previous entry.)
. . .I'd offer to help, but I don't think he feels he needs any more.. Since he says he already has a lot of native speakers helping him. Though, of course, the more seasoned reader of my blog should already know my opinion of just getting any random native speaker as a substitutionary teacher. As I already said to him, although the native speaker will be able to tell what sounds right and what doesn't, it doesn't mean that they'll be able to grammatically (and nay, linguistically) quantify why something is valid or not. Though from what I've seen in the university, those people don't really know English either, so I question their ability to cater to the needs of the English-speaking true beginner.
. . .This sorta just made me think about learning in general -- is it better to start from many sources and sorta go through a filter process, ending with only the best sources, or is it better to start with one source, at least getting consistency in education, and later finding later sources to perhaps verify or correct past flaws in one's initial education?
. . .Run-on sentence, I know. Ahaha. But seriously. Come to think of it, I've largely relied on myself for learning mostly anything, which a dear friend of mine says is an admirable quality (something about having the supposed self-discipline to stick to something)... ...and something about being "always so dedicated to whatever [I'm] into at the moment".
. . .Yay for me, I suppose, but gives me a horrible basis to figure out how exactly to be a good teacher. Since I've basically been my own teacher. heh. Though I find that a lot of it has to do with personality and humour. My Writer's Craft teacher was always fun, but my OAC English teacher was ... ... well, she's been described as an 80-year old, hemorrhoid lesbian. ... .. with a nasty, scaly hide. I know, I'm not too generous when it comes to describing people I don't like. but you've gotta appreciate the diction, no?
. . .I mean, the ability to articulate one's thoughts into real words instead of a combination of sounds and actions is what I find to be a true sign of fluency in a language.
. . .So by following that definition, I'd most definately be fluent in English (which my Writers Craft teacher said too. "Very fluent, I'd say!" he said. But in Chinese... I'd have to say I'm merely 'proficient'. Most people are like, "just being able to be understood is good enough" as if I'm supposed to take comfort in knowing that my Chinese isn't perfect. But just give me 5 years of uninterrupted study and I can almost guarentee I'll easily surpass at least 70% of the Mandarin-speaking population.
. . .What I actually find most entertaining is people whose native language is English, who don't know English very thoroughly, and are already trying to becoming something totally different. (A certain classmate in my Japanese class comes to mind...) He had amazing Japanese diction (pure dictionary work, in my opinion), but he couldn't hope to properly speak, both because he didn't have enough practice, and also because he hadn't properly grasped the differing concepts of time in either language. (e.g. the difference between "I have eaten an apple" and "I ate an apple")
. . .Not that I'm criticizing him or anything... ... learning another language is already an admirable act, regardless of one's abiltiy and adaptability to alternate linguistic modes of thinking. (If that term doesn't already exist, I'm sooo making it one when I get my PhD in Linguistics.) =P
. . .In a linguistics book I picked up once, it said that everything is translatable from one language to another, with varying degrees of literary elegance and effeciency. Which is very often why words are 'borrowed' from one language to another. (though it's not like they're ever gonna return them....)
. . .For me, a word should only properly be termed as borrowed if it's used in place of a native word, while they're trying to make their own word for it. E.g. In Japanese, "Baseball" can be considered a borrowed word, because now they've tossed it back to English; they have their own word for it now. (Yakyuu -- 野球)
. . .Otherwise, I think a more appropriate term is "assimilated" or "adapted", though I suppose the former sounds too intimiating. (As if "accusative" doesn't to describe Latin grammar.)
. . .Aaaaanyways, back to my point. So yah, learning languages is a real challenge, no matter who you are. (Unless you're me. In which case it's just expected. lol)
. . .So after my tedious literal translation of that short dialogue (which is so wrong for so many different reasons), I went back to reading that Chinese novel... (at page 95/377... I have like, another few months to go... Man, I feel so... .... normal. Ew... make that feeling go away!!!)
. . .I'm feeling pretty happy. Both friends finally received my letters. ^_^ One of them, Alison, showed it to her roommate, who was apparently, absolutely shocked at the umm... non-conformist standards I had from most males' penmanship. (If indeed most males can be said to possess any form of penmanship at all.)
. . .And my conversation with her ended up with both of us trying to figure out what the antonym of personification is. Poly-something-morphism. yess.. lol.. help me out here, anybody... Anybody??? =D
2003/11/10
*thud*
. . .I'm losing my ability to write. So tired today. And I'll need lots of energy tomorrow. *sighs* maybe once I start editing my friend's essay, my mood'll change.
. . .Now, I'm not a pessimist (just a cynic), but I noticed that nobody ever bothers to comment on the longer entries... I wonder if it's cuz they can't afford the time to read through it all, or if they just don't know what to say, or if they're unthinkably insincere and only read the beginning and the ending. *sniffs*
. . .But yah... poeple never seem to give any input on the issues that seem to matter more.. it's more about jokes and laughs about what linguistic blunder I've done, or what sort of miscommunication I've endured.
. . .Where's the love? Are all my friend's just fair-weather friends? (do you guys even know the term?) :'(
. . .Now, I'm not a pessimist (just a cynic), but I noticed that nobody ever bothers to comment on the longer entries... I wonder if it's cuz they can't afford the time to read through it all, or if they just don't know what to say, or if they're unthinkably insincere and only read the beginning and the ending. *sniffs*
. . .But yah... poeple never seem to give any input on the issues that seem to matter more.. it's more about jokes and laughs about what linguistic blunder I've done, or what sort of miscommunication I've endured.
. . .Where's the love? Are all my friend's just fair-weather friends? (do you guys even know the term?) :'(
2003/11/07
Crime and Punishment
. . .No, I haven't read the book yet, although it also is written by Fyodor Dostoevsky. I bought it at a bargain/second=hand bookstore, apparently affiliated with Shir Da University. Since it was used, I got the Penguin books unabridged version for $2.76 Canadian, baby! Ahaha. But I promised myself not to read it 'til I finished reading at least 10 Chinese novels. After all, that's why I'm here in Taiwan, right? To learn Chinese...
. . .Meanwhile, I had to do my report for school... ...read an 'interesting' memory from my childhood -- which was our theme. After I finished reading it, my teacher asked if the other classmates understood what I said. There was a resounding echo of "no..." So my teacher had to basically restate/rephrase basically everything I had said. Yarg. But I'm happy. After class, I asked my teacher what she felt my actual proficiency was. She said that although I didn't know some of the most basic grammar points, my proficiency was quite high -- around "upper intermediate 3", which would be 4/15 proficiency levels higher than my original assessment by the University.
. . .And after talking some more, apparently the university normally *does* have a written test for assessing proficiency, but for some god-forbidden reason, I was 'exempted' from it... ... it's such a big farce, in my opinion... Professionalism at the University level, I mean.
. . .But yah. Test on Monday on some crazy essay. Gotta memorize and learn weird archaic Chinese again. (yay me!) It's been one freakishly hot week since Sunday cuz of the typhoon. (yes, I blame it all on you, typhoon!) But weatherman said it'll be cooler on Sunday... *crosses fingers*
. . .Meanwhile, I had to do my report for school... ...read an 'interesting' memory from my childhood -- which was our theme. After I finished reading it, my teacher asked if the other classmates understood what I said. There was a resounding echo of "no..." So my teacher had to basically restate/rephrase basically everything I had said. Yarg. But I'm happy. After class, I asked my teacher what she felt my actual proficiency was. She said that although I didn't know some of the most basic grammar points, my proficiency was quite high -- around "upper intermediate 3", which would be 4/15 proficiency levels higher than my original assessment by the University.
. . .And after talking some more, apparently the university normally *does* have a written test for assessing proficiency, but for some god-forbidden reason, I was 'exempted' from it... ... it's such a big farce, in my opinion... Professionalism at the University level, I mean.
. . .But yah. Test on Monday on some crazy essay. Gotta memorize and learn weird archaic Chinese again. (yay me!) It's been one freakishly hot week since Sunday cuz of the typhoon. (yes, I blame it all on you, typhoon!) But weatherman said it'll be cooler on Sunday... *crosses fingers*
2003/11/06
Happy Tides?
. . .Kinda happy. Yesterday was my first day teaching two little 10-year old kids, Kevin and Vivian. And I was late. By 30 minutes. So Vivian's mom wasn't too happy. And Kevin's mom didn't sound too impressed either.
. . .But ahaha, boy they're so cute!!! They were so nervous at first, not really speaking much. So I started asking a lot of questions. "Did you want to be here or upstairs? Did you go to school today? What's your favourite colour?" And so on and so forth.
. . .Vivian seemed a bit more keen. And after whipping out my sketchbook, they started to become very interested. Attention span of a child is hilarious! With friends like Shelly, I've had all the training I need to be with kids! Hehe.. so in a sense, thank you Shelly for being who you are.
. . .And I want my money back, Oxford Seminars... Stupid people. Dun know what they're talking about. So anyways, I started pointing to different parts of my illustrations and asking them questions, "what part of the body is this? is it an ear or an eye? What about this? horn, tail or wing? How old does the woman look?" Ah, they're funny. And they have this amazingly 2-track mind about it too! They speak to me in minimalistic English while they talk to each other in Mandarin. I wonder if they know I can understand them.
. . .Heheh.. and we like, finished a pack of cookies during the session. Kids are a bit wild, but nothing I can't handle... ... yet. ^_^
. . .OATUS, I've been recently trying to revive my french. Trying to remember the 'exceptions' for the passé composé. Always avoir except for uhh... .... something for être. Hmm... gotta go back and learn my verbs... ... and conjugation! je suis, tu est, il/elle es, nous something, vous ette, ills/elles sont. or something.... ahh... man, my french is too messy... T_T
. . .And on yet another side of the complex life of Joseph Tam, I've been reinitiating contact with close friends and family. ^_^ Suddenly found out that a certain friend has had a gf for 10 months. Didn't see that one coming. But she seemed a nice enough person online.
. . .Ooh... Dinner time... will finish blog later.
. . .But ahaha, boy they're so cute!!! They were so nervous at first, not really speaking much. So I started asking a lot of questions. "Did you want to be here or upstairs? Did you go to school today? What's your favourite colour?" And so on and so forth.
. . .Vivian seemed a bit more keen. And after whipping out my sketchbook, they started to become very interested. Attention span of a child is hilarious! With friends like Shelly, I've had all the training I need to be with kids! Hehe.. so in a sense, thank you Shelly for being who you are.
. . .And I want my money back, Oxford Seminars... Stupid people. Dun know what they're talking about. So anyways, I started pointing to different parts of my illustrations and asking them questions, "what part of the body is this? is it an ear or an eye? What about this? horn, tail or wing? How old does the woman look?" Ah, they're funny. And they have this amazingly 2-track mind about it too! They speak to me in minimalistic English while they talk to each other in Mandarin. I wonder if they know I can understand them.
. . .Heheh.. and we like, finished a pack of cookies during the session. Kids are a bit wild, but nothing I can't handle... ... yet. ^_^
. . .OATUS, I've been recently trying to revive my french. Trying to remember the 'exceptions' for the passé composé. Always avoir except for uhh... .... something for être. Hmm... gotta go back and learn my verbs... ... and conjugation! je suis, tu est, il/elle es, nous something, vous ette, ills/elles sont. or something.... ahh... man, my french is too messy... T_T
. . .And on yet another side of the complex life of Joseph Tam, I've been reinitiating contact with close friends and family. ^_^ Suddenly found out that a certain friend has had a gf for 10 months. Didn't see that one coming. But she seemed a nice enough person online.
. . .Ooh... Dinner time... will finish blog later.
2003/11/04
Mixed Messages
. . .Despite the best efforts of our most gifted linguists, linguisticians, grammaticians and writers, people will always have a personal way of perceiving, handling and using any given language. I say 'fugstigate' for tersity and literary elegance, but a pratical, pragmatic businessman from America may perceive such obvious fluency in a language to be condescending and pretentious.
. . .Of course, pretentiousness is only valid if one's credentials are either ludicrous, unrelated or well below-par. From this, one could almost say that although we, in the English language, haven't as finely distincted forms of speech as say the Japanese do (in plain, polite, respectful and humble language) we obviously do have these forms in our daily communication.
. . .But of course, without clearly defining these forms of speech, it's up to the speaker and the listener to determine what they find to be obtuse, crude, rude or offensive. On the other hand, it's also up to the speaker and the listener to determine what they find to be kind, polite, humble or respectful.
. . .As it appears to be in any established civilization, the forms of respect seem to use 'bigger words' and simple ideas or contructs become elaborate, flowery lines of poetry. Compare this to the stark construct of what we perceive in modern American movies, where it's cool to presume a familiar tone with strangers -- something which I find to be rather presumptuous.
. . .But sadly, most people are rather paradoxial in their perception. They look at those of the older generation and find them pompous, criticizing their sesquipedalian use of English, saying that they should acquiesce to the level of the listener. Hypocritically, they don't seem to ever adjust their own presumtuous form of speech when talking with another person, or even trying to understand where the other person is coming from. Communication should be bi-directional, but most people seem to be too caught up in criticizing others to realize their own ignorance.
. . .Which brings to mind a line I learned at a young age, "practise what you preach". I shall admit that I too am very guilty for sometimes doing something contrary to what I say ought to be. But thankfully, I've sharp (and sometimes vengeful) friends and associates who are very quick to point out when I'm being self-contradicting.
. . .While I dare not make a commentary on what I term "American society", I shall share ideas which I've read from an essay back in high school. In the essay, the author presented the idea that the central difference between Canadian society and American society is that of a mossaic and a melting pot.
. . .The author continued by explaining that in the mossaic, all the individual colours are preserved, but they fit and weave together to form a beautiful tapestry. That is to say, while there is a common ground upon which Canadians interact, those of the staggering percentage who are of immigrant status, or of immigrant descent are able to preserve their own cultural heritage. Which, in my opinion, is saying that there is no definitive qualities in the term "Canadian culture" because what exactly happens in Canadian society is essentially dependent on the cultural identity of the resident.
. . .On the other hand, the author(probably Canadian), compared American society to a melting pot, where all the beautiful and distinct elements(or ingredients) are all mixed together to form a solution (or colloid, if you're lucky). In this essay, the author explained that although there is an equally staggering percentage of residents who are immigrants or of immigrant descent, most induhviduals(a borrowed term from Scott Adams) seem to cast away whatever richness their ethnic culture had to offer for the pugent, probing scent of what was termed 'American Society'.
. . .And vehemently avoiding any talk of how USA is perceived in the various nations, their politics and/or history between other countries, it is at the very least commendable that what we now term "America", though technically only one of many countries of North, South [and Central] America, has been strong enough to at least develop their own distinct sense of culture, society and values.
. . .The only criticism I'd dare to venture is that USA seems to be a bit too ego-centric. Yes, USA is a scary world power. Yes, USA is very influencial. And yes, USA is perhaps the strongest [or most influencial] nation economically, militarily and culturally. But from my experience, and from the numerous humerous anecdotes I hear from my various Canadian friends from their experiences in America, as well as an online quiz (hosted by National Geographic, I think), the average anecdotal American seems to be disasterously ignorant of anything outside its borders.
. . .Admittedly, it's usually only the extreme cases who make it into the anecdotal annals of Canadian ridicule, but in my conversations with many people, most seem to either agree or hold a similar perspective of the melting pot vs. the mossaic(or tapestry) imagery.
. . .Which really gets me thinking. Aside from a very attractive idea I picked up from Record of Lodoss Wars, I wonder how grand it is for people to have 'good, wholesome American values' when it only seems to promote arrogance in themselves and ignorance of the world outside. (And believe it or not but there's a vast world outside of the United States of America.)
. . .It is with little wonder that most people here in Taiwan and HK (whom I've met anyways), look down on most ABC's and CBC's, calling them 'white-washed', 'westernized', etc. And it's no wonder that I've had such a hard time proving them wrong because of their already blinding stigmatism that led them to believe that I was a Westerner just because I was raised in Canada.
. . .So while I'm not blaming the hordes of ABC's and CBC's who perhaps haven't had a linguistically disasterous childhood as I had, I do feel that both in the Far East and in the West there is an alarming lack of acceptence for 'originality' and 'individuality'.
. . .Asia probably has it worst; if you're not a male doctor, lawer, mathematician, scientist, computer geek or engineer, you're pretty much looked down upon as a failure. It's sad to see that those 3000 years of highly developed and refined culture extinguished because of the money-grubbing, greedy, pragmatic attitude of most modern Oriental people.
. . .At least in America, there's a fighting chance of earning a living as a foreign cultures' expert, linguist, artist, musician or actor. But here, in Taiwan, actors and models are looked down upon, finding them to be of 'cheap quality' and noting that after their popularity wanes, most of them don't seem to have any other skills upon which they can rely.
. . .So while American values may give the illusion of promoting ignorance, they at the very least encourage individuals to explore their interests and do "what they feel is right".
. . .And while most modern people cannot hope to appreciate artistic and skillful linguistic agility, equating "emotion" and "feeling", I stand firm in my conviction and persistence in encouraging what appears to be a dying art in what once was known as Literature.
. . .Of course, pretentiousness is only valid if one's credentials are either ludicrous, unrelated or well below-par. From this, one could almost say that although we, in the English language, haven't as finely distincted forms of speech as say the Japanese do (in plain, polite, respectful and humble language) we obviously do have these forms in our daily communication.
. . .But of course, without clearly defining these forms of speech, it's up to the speaker and the listener to determine what they find to be obtuse, crude, rude or offensive. On the other hand, it's also up to the speaker and the listener to determine what they find to be kind, polite, humble or respectful.
. . .As it appears to be in any established civilization, the forms of respect seem to use 'bigger words' and simple ideas or contructs become elaborate, flowery lines of poetry. Compare this to the stark construct of what we perceive in modern American movies, where it's cool to presume a familiar tone with strangers -- something which I find to be rather presumptuous.
. . .But sadly, most people are rather paradoxial in their perception. They look at those of the older generation and find them pompous, criticizing their sesquipedalian use of English, saying that they should acquiesce to the level of the listener. Hypocritically, they don't seem to ever adjust their own presumtuous form of speech when talking with another person, or even trying to understand where the other person is coming from. Communication should be bi-directional, but most people seem to be too caught up in criticizing others to realize their own ignorance.
. . .Which brings to mind a line I learned at a young age, "practise what you preach". I shall admit that I too am very guilty for sometimes doing something contrary to what I say ought to be. But thankfully, I've sharp (and sometimes vengeful) friends and associates who are very quick to point out when I'm being self-contradicting.
. . .While I dare not make a commentary on what I term "American society", I shall share ideas which I've read from an essay back in high school. In the essay, the author presented the idea that the central difference between Canadian society and American society is that of a mossaic and a melting pot.
. . .The author continued by explaining that in the mossaic, all the individual colours are preserved, but they fit and weave together to form a beautiful tapestry. That is to say, while there is a common ground upon which Canadians interact, those of the staggering percentage who are of immigrant status, or of immigrant descent are able to preserve their own cultural heritage. Which, in my opinion, is saying that there is no definitive qualities in the term "Canadian culture" because what exactly happens in Canadian society is essentially dependent on the cultural identity of the resident.
. . .On the other hand, the author(probably Canadian), compared American society to a melting pot, where all the beautiful and distinct elements(or ingredients) are all mixed together to form a solution (or colloid, if you're lucky). In this essay, the author explained that although there is an equally staggering percentage of residents who are immigrants or of immigrant descent, most induhviduals(a borrowed term from Scott Adams) seem to cast away whatever richness their ethnic culture had to offer for the pugent, probing scent of what was termed 'American Society'.
. . .And vehemently avoiding any talk of how USA is perceived in the various nations, their politics and/or history between other countries, it is at the very least commendable that what we now term "America", though technically only one of many countries of North, South [and Central] America, has been strong enough to at least develop their own distinct sense of culture, society and values.
. . .The only criticism I'd dare to venture is that USA seems to be a bit too ego-centric. Yes, USA is a scary world power. Yes, USA is very influencial. And yes, USA is perhaps the strongest [or most influencial] nation economically, militarily and culturally. But from my experience, and from the numerous humerous anecdotes I hear from my various Canadian friends from their experiences in America, as well as an online quiz (hosted by National Geographic, I think), the average anecdotal American seems to be disasterously ignorant of anything outside its borders.
. . .Admittedly, it's usually only the extreme cases who make it into the anecdotal annals of Canadian ridicule, but in my conversations with many people, most seem to either agree or hold a similar perspective of the melting pot vs. the mossaic(or tapestry) imagery.
. . .Which really gets me thinking. Aside from a very attractive idea I picked up from Record of Lodoss Wars, I wonder how grand it is for people to have 'good, wholesome American values' when it only seems to promote arrogance in themselves and ignorance of the world outside. (And believe it or not but there's a vast world outside of the United States of America.)
. . .It is with little wonder that most people here in Taiwan and HK (whom I've met anyways), look down on most ABC's and CBC's, calling them 'white-washed', 'westernized', etc. And it's no wonder that I've had such a hard time proving them wrong because of their already blinding stigmatism that led them to believe that I was a Westerner just because I was raised in Canada.
. . .So while I'm not blaming the hordes of ABC's and CBC's who perhaps haven't had a linguistically disasterous childhood as I had, I do feel that both in the Far East and in the West there is an alarming lack of acceptence for 'originality' and 'individuality'.
. . .Asia probably has it worst; if you're not a male doctor, lawer, mathematician, scientist, computer geek or engineer, you're pretty much looked down upon as a failure. It's sad to see that those 3000 years of highly developed and refined culture extinguished because of the money-grubbing, greedy, pragmatic attitude of most modern Oriental people.
. . .At least in America, there's a fighting chance of earning a living as a foreign cultures' expert, linguist, artist, musician or actor. But here, in Taiwan, actors and models are looked down upon, finding them to be of 'cheap quality' and noting that after their popularity wanes, most of them don't seem to have any other skills upon which they can rely.
. . .So while American values may give the illusion of promoting ignorance, they at the very least encourage individuals to explore their interests and do "what they feel is right".
. . .And while most modern people cannot hope to appreciate artistic and skillful linguistic agility, equating "emotion" and "feeling", I stand firm in my conviction and persistence in encouraging what appears to be a dying art in what once was known as Literature.
2003/11/02
Taste
. . .Taste the rainbow. Or, buy some skittles. I prefer the latter; more sugar.
. . .This weekend was a colossal waste of time. Ended up clocking more hours in front of the TV than in my book... which would have been SO much more productive. Ah well. Reading shall yet be done!
. . .Speaking of reading... I shouldn't be here blogging... ^^;
. . .Ahaha!! Found a really funny quote by Don Hirschberg, "Calling atheism a religion is like calling bald a hair colour". Also finally found that hilarious quote I loved. It's by James D. Nicholl, "The problem with defending the purity of the English language is that English is about as pure as a cribhouse whore. We don't just borrow words; on occasion, English has pursued other languages down alleyways to beat them unconscious and rifle their pockets for new vocabulary."
. . .Recent conversation suddenly inspired me to rant a bit about communication. In previous entries, I've stressed the importance of fluency of English for sake of seamless communication. But as my fiercely contrasting conversation partner as pointed out, such tacit fluency in English can also come across as pretentiousness for the more practical English conversationalists.
. . .As I've said many a time, I'm a dying breed. Those who share my form of speech and ideas are dead or dying or all too few. The world is always changing, and perhaps I should take a step back and allow the new generation to thrive.
. . .This weekend was a colossal waste of time. Ended up clocking more hours in front of the TV than in my book... which would have been SO much more productive. Ah well. Reading shall yet be done!
. . .Speaking of reading... I shouldn't be here blogging... ^^;
. . .Ahaha!! Found a really funny quote by Don Hirschberg, "Calling atheism a religion is like calling bald a hair colour". Also finally found that hilarious quote I loved. It's by James D. Nicholl, "The problem with defending the purity of the English language is that English is about as pure as a cribhouse whore. We don't just borrow words; on occasion, English has pursued other languages down alleyways to beat them unconscious and rifle their pockets for new vocabulary."
. . .Recent conversation suddenly inspired me to rant a bit about communication. In previous entries, I've stressed the importance of fluency of English for sake of seamless communication. But as my fiercely contrasting conversation partner as pointed out, such tacit fluency in English can also come across as pretentiousness for the more practical English conversationalists.
. . .As I've said many a time, I'm a dying breed. Those who share my form of speech and ideas are dead or dying or all too few. The world is always changing, and perhaps I should take a step back and allow the new generation to thrive.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)